I feel like telling you all the shit-ola I read about celebrities today. What a buzz kill of a day. I depend on them to lift me up, and give me something to laugh at or atleast a quick OMG she/he didn't! But alas, here's a list of stuff that left me saying, "Who cares?"
1. Amy Winehouse Wed her fiance'. So what...I'd be more interested in the animals nesting in that beehive of hers
2. Paula Abdul broke her nose - would be interesting if she was going to show up in a bandage with black eyes, or if there was footage of her falling over her chihuahua with a martini in one hand and a blunt in the other, but alas, this only exists in my head, and it's effing funny...sorry you can't be here with me.
3. Finales of Desperate Housewives - do we really think Edie commits suicide. Nope.
4. Paris Hilton - no news is good news
5. Britney - more lip syncing. At this point, real singing would be the news. Otherwise, lame status quo.
6. Mayer and Simpson - still split. Ok, move on press people and break up some other couple. There has to be someone new slipping it to Scarlett Johanssen this week, right? I'm tired of "Jess the Hooker" pics from Pussycat Dolls in Vegas or pics of her from Cannes.
7. Pam Anderson at Cannes gets booed. Not sure...is there a "b" missing. Was that supposed to be "Boobed", like someone slingshot a rock at her ta tas and deflated one. Is this a medical drama story? Again, maybe only in my head.
8. Hasslehoff gets kids visitation - mmm...me thinks Child Protective Services turned a blind eye on this one...and who cares
9. Mischa Barton has a nipple slip - ok, enough of the nips and coochie shots. Let's get creative people. Seen one, seen them all..and really, who cares about these stupid girls with 12 year old boy boobs...I've seen cats nursing their young with more interesting body parts. What I care about is when are the boys going to start leaving the barn doors open? The occasional zipper stuck in the down position? Hello? (God help me if Dad reads this one. I may be out of the will)
10. Lindsay Lohan still an alcoholic. Mmm. Let's spice that up a bit and add...and a hooker and a drug addict. And what about this is news? Notta. Look at the she-demon that raised her? Uggh.
Thus concludes my shiteous, crapola day at work. I just wasn't feeling it today. God help those people that had to interact with me. I even lost my temper at the salad bar when they ran out of little tiny edamame peas. I am pitiful. I'll be better tomorrow, promise, because it's final performance day people. And despite the fact that this has been more of a Mikela/Constantine season than a Carrie/Daughtry, we owe it to hug it out and watch with enthusiasm.
Don't forget to watch "ON THE LOT' after tomorrow nights final sing out. 3 songs. And of those 3 songs 2 are the winners of the song contest that they staged this year.
bye now.
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4 comments:
...More things the media should never talk about again...
1. Anything involving Anna Nicole Smith
2. Anything involving Michael Jackson
3. Anything involving Brittany Spears until she debuts her new album and starts a legit tour.
4. Paris Hilton
5. Sanjaya
Agree. And I would add Lohan to the list.
Totally agreed - and yeah, Lohan needs to be on that list. Like, is she even a good actress? Like, really? I mean, I can be objective (really! I know you laugh, but it's totally true -- I can hate everything about Justin Timberlake and still buy his music, because it's catchy -- with the exception of Russell Crowe, I'll see a lot of movies made by people or starring people I think are absolute assholes...I think Chris Hutchensen is a total dick, but I still read his columns in Slate and Vanity Fair is still one of my favorite magazines...I CAN be objective, if the talent requires it), and she just never struck me as even remotely special. She's not bad - she's actually pretty good -- but it's not like she's the next coming of Jodie Foster or Meryl Streep. She's no fucking Winona Ryder or Natalie Portman (and Portman was Ryder's successor -- in the teen ingenue becomes successful adult star/Academy Award nominee before hitting 25 category) -- if any Disney star is going to follow that route, it's going to be Anne Hathaway anyway -- not Lohan.
I mean, Winona fucking stole some shit from Saks...got sentenced unfairly (dude, she shouldn't have hired Garagos, Barry Sheck was right, he should have been disbarred for losing that case...Sheck or Gerry Spence should have been her representation) and has had a hard time coming back - and no one has EVER complained about Winona on set (so she likes to sleep with rock stars from Minnesota, Johnny Depp and Matt Damon - who among us wouldn't have her sex life if we had the chance?) -- Lindsay is a disaster, causes huge scenes at major industry events when she spots her former assistant with a different actress (one who actually has respect and a career) and is like a walking "this is how NOT to raise a child" manual, and people still talk about her. Insane.
OMG Cole...that is the funniest thing I have ever read...Paula with her martini and blunt...I laughed so hard at the visual I almost peed my pants!!! Can't wait for tonights show. Hopefully it won't disappoint us Idolfreaks.
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