Performance Night...Tony B is in the House

SO, here we go...another week of performances and they all have to morph into an 80 year old man who's famous for crooning about losing his cardiac organ in Northern California. I'm predicting that it will be ok for most of the idols...Gina better pull out some sultry sexy thing,..like My Funny Valentine...which I've said before.

For those of you new to this blog, I write in real-time while watching the show and give my votes before the judges...and it's fun to see how well I match up with the Prince Of Darkness, Simon. Those that sing well, they get alot of Carries...(my favorite female Idol, C. Underwood)....Men get Daughtrys (same reason). It's really hard to get 5 out of 5. IF you suck so bad I fast-forward my Tivo, then you get a Mikala (remember Mikala Gordon? I know, you try not too, yes, she was the Fran Drescher contestant a few seasons ago) or you get a Constantine (same reason).

Blake- really nice vocal...starting to look like the same performance each week, but not really bringing it up a notch to me. I sort of know what to expect with him now. Maybe he brought his A game too early, which I think alot of contestants do. If you look at who gets the judges sitting close to the edge of their seats, it the ones that are wowing them...and sometimes it's because they are so much improved over the previous week. And some of the contestants are clearly better than others, but have an off week and get terrible remarks. So back to Blake. I'm going to give him a solid 3.5 Daugtrys. Seems the judges agree. sort of

Phil- I think this guy has chops. But I can't get past the bald head. I just can't. He's a husband too. And given these remarks, I start to realize I judge these idols for the whole package. I'm looking for the performer, the singer, the image, the personality. Phil scores high for me on singing...not so much on other things. For me, this was a very strong vocal, but drab delivery. 3 Daughtrys Judges: Bingo.

Melinda- I'm tired of power vocals and shaking her money maker in her wig-of-the-week. Is she competing with Sanjaya for who can do the most with their hair each week. And for Jimmy Choo-sake, stop cramming her Nike wearing foot into those 5 inch stilettos. She's going to break an ankle or fall and bust a hip any week now. The boys all get to wear tennis shoes, and the girls get hooker heels. Some it works on...some it don't. 3.5 Carries Judges: same shit they spew on her each week.

Chris-first week this dude has really looked cute to me. And he ain't doin' nothing to distance himself from the JT comparison is he? He's no dummy that's for sure. He had a real sexy side-snipe lip quiver this week that I am sure was not lost on a bunch of 16 year olds with lightening speed dialing or texting fingers. I thought he was great. The suspenders were distracting but I'm not a boy, maybe those are rad right now. Whatever. 4 Daughtrys Judges: really don't care what they say this week, do I?
Gina - OK, who is the hair stylist this week? She has a red waterfall of hear on her head and white shiny eyeshadow on her pale complexion. Love this song, and she is singing it nicely. Whoa, wait a minute, she's standing now and suddenly she Gina Dominatrix of the Kodak Theatre. Why did they dress her like that? It disconnects from the song really. Weird for me. And braids look like skull surgery stitches, like she came out of a Tim Burton movie. I don't know. 3.5 Carries.

Jordin - she is leagues above the rest and gets 5 Carries from me. Ok, I'm biased and she is my favorite, so no, I will not give her anything but love and praise. So there. I can't wait to slap down my money and buy her cd. 5 Carries Shut it Simon.

And now ladies and gentleman, next up is...Enrique "Sanjaya" Sanders...Colonel Sanders lost Cuban Cousin from Miami. If this is the Universe of Sanjaya, stop the spinning, I want off. He's believing his own press. Nothing to say except he is laughable and well, nothing more to say. 5 Constantines

Note to Haley.., ohknowyoudidn't..you just dissed 2/3's of the judging panel...and sided with the Prince of Darkness. I hope that doesn't come back to bite you. She was pretty...and he vocals have definitely improved over the weeks. They really pick nice clothing for her to show off her legs for sure. I'm sure Simon hasn't seen her face yet. 3.5 Carries Judges: OH DID I CALL THAT ONE OR WHAT? That Randy and Pauler are PISSED and I don't blame them. Haley, you are so on your way out of here. And just as I predicted the bite comes from Simon, when he doesn't have your back, girl. Even Simon felt sorry for Pauler and Randy and tried to draw out their thoughts. Ha! theres the comment on the legs. Enough said. Bye Haley, you better hope Phil goes first. Or the obvious, he who shall not be named. Sanjaya-mort

KiKi, Oh, she looks like a million dollars tonite. After taxes. Of course, nice vocals. Did you see that sultry sexy "constantine" stare at the finish? Hilarious. I'm not buying that. She's KiKi, not Mariah. And she disses Tony B's suggestion not to sing the song as it was written. Mmm. . 4 Carries

Well, all in all, nice show. HIghlight was Pauler and Randy diss and the whole uncomfortable thing. Even Ryan seemed a little itchy in the shorts on that one. Ok, well, more tomorrow night.