My feet have chosen to leave me for another body. I'm walking on stumps now. I was so tired yesterday, I never got dressed (that was my day 'off' from the convention) and I had to be back there by 8:30 this morning, which is an hour drive away from here. Anyway, I made it in plenty of time.
All in all, I would give that convention a 10 out of 10. No shit. I was in Yarn Heaven, and there wasn't one thing I would complain about...NOT ONE. And I'm a complainer, so this is saying alot. You know, as I grow older, I see how easily I could slip into the crabby phase if I don't watch it. For example, out of the blue, this lady just walked up to me and said "I don't like that we don't get free coffee outside the meeting rooms any more, and I prefer my water chilled." And I just looked at her like she was from Mars. She said, "Don't you think?" And I said, "Lady, I'm just happy to not be at my desk today, listening to people's demands for stuff due yesterday. I would enjoy cold oatmeal in this lobby." She knew she better shut the hell up and get her negative ass away from me. Of course, I didn't insult her, I said all the above with a Texas twang and my usual charm, followed by my silly school girl giggle, (all patented moves), and she slithered off. Ugh. What a waste of my yarn heaven space she was.
Now let's talk about the crazy lady that walked up to me and said, "Oh, I just love your hair color." And I had just pulled my hat off, had hat hair, and she was so admiring me. It was weird. And she suddenly got embarrassed and said, "I'm sorry, I should walk up to a stranger like that but your hair is beautiful." I replied, "Yes, you should walk up to strangers. You made my day. I pay ALOT OF MONEY for that color." We both laughed, because she thought it was natural and I assured her, it was not. (This woman must not have heard of highlights because no one grows their hair with stripes...my highlights are pretty pronounced, but I have super curly hair, today atleast, without the magic of the flat iron!) I digress.
I had a sweater making class, and I grabbed a sample sweater from my closet, and we had to spread them out to measure. And the teacher walked up just as I spotted a coffee stain on the front. OMG, so embarrassing. O-well. She had purple hair and by the end of the class, was walking around in her stocking feet. ha ha.
And finally, the most shocking event of the weekend. I was buying some yarn, and looked up to hand my money to the lady, realizing just then that the 3 year old climbing in her lap, was ripping her boob out of her bra to NURSE. For fuck's sake, that little brat was attacking her like a toddler leech. And that freaking milk was spewing down her shirt. I thought I was gonna' puke and I was sort of embarrassed for her, because she was trying not to wrestle the screaming child. I don't have kids, so I don't get it, but isn't there a rule or something that when they have teeth, can speak, and overpower you and undo your bra, it's time to wean them off the boobies? That should be a rule, if it's not. I don't care what you do at home or in the ladies room at the mall, or in a park, but at a fucking cash register? Seriously???????????? "Here's your change, don't mind the titty milk, it washes off." gag.
So, American Idol..hmmm.
I sort of like the new format. It's alot of filler though. I can already see who the 'wild cards' are from this week....Megan...Jasmine Murray. Adam made it, and the 40 year old bar fly trapped in a 16 year old body. I swear to God it reminds of that movie BIG, except she's an old lady trapped in kids body, instead of a kid trapped in Tom Hanks body. She looks like she is trying to seduce Ryan like a scene in The Graduate. So weird.
Paula is signing off. She's not going to be back next year, mark my words. Kara is bumping her out. Promise you. This is Pauler's final year on her contract.
Bye now. More later.
xoxo,
ColeyB
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