Welcome to Coley B's Blog-O-Rama of Drama

Blogstress, Cole Bronn, writes little tidbits and occasionally rants about American Idol and other celebrity gossip. And she knits too.

Sunday, July 29, 2007

Sunday night...and I feel sick

I just have never been able to pull it together today. I mean really, I just couldn't manage anything. For lunch I ate a bag of popcorn and a bunch of green grapes. My husband went to the drag races and I was just listless.

So, I decided to be productive and go buy some new bras. What the fuck was I thinking? Nothing will send you over the edge quicker than trying on 18 bras only to find that you really like only 1. My husband hates me to complain about them, and was so excited to hear that I found one, and said "I hope you bought every one on the rack, and all of them in the surrounding counties." I said no...because you can only buy them one at a time, and wear them to work for a few days. If there is no subsequent stabbing from the wires, strap slippage or nip knotting, then, AND ONLY THEN, do you have a bonafide winner that results in the hording of that particular model. So, tomorrow begins the trial of the new Olga bra.
So, does that story tell you what an acid bath my life has turned to? Ugh. So, I tried to cheer myself up today and watch all the funny shows...Best Week Ever, The Soup and Seacrest's show. Well, I swear to all things celebrity, I dream of the days of Nick and Jessica's breakup and Jude Law sleeping with the Nanny. I am sick, sick, sick to death of the latest story of someone going to jail for dui. But, there are a few funny moments in it all. Britney Spears was featured in a segment called "Not to be Outdone", which was sort of making fun of her not being happy that all the attention is on Nicole and Lindsay right now. So BritBrit hauls her kids across state lines which was against the law, so she has some criminal acts for the weekend and I hope she feels better. They also report that she yelled at a papparots "hey you fatass, why don't you go to Weight Watchers..." and then the Soup dude says "turns out the jokes on britbrit as the papparazzi were holding up a mirror. " LOL

Anyway, in the entire weekend, the worst and best thing I saw was a picture of that fool Perez Hilton, with all his fatage in full muffin top mode, with his tiny little man package in pink pantie like things. I swear a circus freak would not have worn that shit in the Big Top. No way. It was heinous. And they made so much fun of it on E!. Let me see if I can find a pic to post. Be right back...........

Found it. And listen, I am partially blind now because there are 3 pictures that literally stole the brown from my eyes. I have NEVER seen a worse case of male cameltoe in my life. This is not for the weak. Please do not look further, but for those that must see celebrity roadkill, here it is.




Oh, man, how can you live with yourself after pulling that stunt? I mean really, that was just heinous. And I also see that he pulled out one of his cahoneys for a TMZ camera guy too. And they reported that he only has one. And it's tiny. Men can be as cruel as woman, it seems.

Ok, making fun of Perez has really cheered me up. Hee Hee.

5 comments:

Lu said...

this is so bad it's great. he has to be making fun of brit. he just has to....

but now i too am partially blind.

Anonymous said...

ugh. I come here to drop you a note about some American Idols, and I end up seeing this guys Camel Toe. Yuck.

Anyway, looks like Sundance and Sabrina have been signed:

http://www.tmz.com/2007/07/30/american-idol-cover-album/

windycitynut said...

So, is this where "pink taco" came from?? I will now go gouge my eyes out with a fork. I will not blog any longer while heavily medicated. Thanks Cole.

Anonymous said...

American Idol auditions started yesterday. Hippeeee!!!

Anonymous said...

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070731/ap_en_mu/people_corey_clark

Poor Corey. Maybe his drugs were really Paula's.