:05 Min. from Declaring Sanjaya-Free Zone

I've got the Devil on one shoulder and the Angel on the other, and my Ipod in both ears. I just don't know who or what to listen to, so I'm putting it out there to YOU...should we continue to participate in the Sanjaya fever sweeping the nation? Is this what this show has become...one singer, no talent, let's see how bad he can become? Is it bringing me as much joy as when I watched this little hayseed Okie from Chekotah, OK start to blossom like the most beautiful flower on stage each week? NO, it is not. Am I just sitting on the edge of my seat each week waiting to see Chris Daughtry tear it up and blow me away? NO, I am not. And do I wish I was watching a SUPERSTAR in the making? YES I DO... So, what do I do, when I don't see a SuperStar, because I am too focused on the SuperPooPoo? That little bouncing turd with a wig has ruined what I love about Idol, but AM I ENABLING IT TO HAPPEN? I'm choosing to focus on SuperPooPoo and maybe I am missing the talent starting to shine. And sadly, I think I am not alone. America is focusing on the negative, at a time when we need to lift our spirits, and root for the good guy. We are at WAR for God's sake, and I know for a fact, this blog is being read by some armed services members. We need to get back to being snarky about wardrobe and stupid stuff, not bitching about this poor guy who is clearly out of his league but has to stay due to a-holes like Stern and such voting him through.

Help me decide. No more Sanjaya here? At all, or except on performance night or vote off night? What's appropriate? As WINDYCITYNUT posted, we will see Sanjaya again...like on Surreal Life sleeping in a bunk bed with Webster.

In case you don't know my favorite Idol contestant by now, it's Jordin. She's my girl. I can see me buying her cd and watching her just be a SuperDuper Star. She's just the right age to be a little media darling with that big 'ol smile whether she is glam or girly... Red Carpet or Basketball court...she is a chameleon. Soon to be Million-chameleonnaire, I predict.
Look, here's our mascot Jordin Chameleon now!


Happy Friday Idol-Izers.

House of Sanjaya Hair Salon

Thanks to those crazy whackjobs that contribute over at YouTube. LMAO! This is from "The Soup". Enjoy!

Ashley Ferl-Sick of her yet?

American Idol Crying Girl Ashley Ferl Is Idol’s Latest Unlikely Star

In addition to making stars out of some of the best singers in America, American Idol is such a powerful television vehicle that anyone that becomes involved with the show has the possibility of becoming an overnight sensation.

Anyone want to take bets we have not seen the last of her? I'm telling you if they have her guest judge one week, I'm done with this show. LOL. Can you imagine her squeezed between Pauler and the Prince of Darkness. The rubber bands would shoot right out of her mouth if she got a whiff of Vodka in Pauler's "Coke" cup. I was grossed out by the spit strings that were all gummed up in there while she was crying. Sickening.

Word to her parents. Start saving for therapy or plastic surgery now, 'cause when she realizes what a CryBaby ass she made of herself on national tv, she'll never forgive you or venture outdoors after age 15 or 16. High School is going to be rough and forget college. Poor crybaby.

Sligh to the End

As I predicted, Chris Sligh bids a classy adieu this evening, and heads off the stage for a final time tonite. As my husband says, atleast he has a hot wife waiting for him backstage...ever the male perspective.

(note to new readers joining us from USA Today...although my name is Cole...I am a female that watches the show with my sidekick husband who runs the remote while I type. Thanks to the guy who left me a comment saying "love your blog dude"...but I feel compelled to set the record straight. I don't want to start fielding comments about Haley's hotness, etc. as if I am in a boy's locker room.)

Back to Idol...also as predicted, that no talent San-jayjay lives to tell his story for another week. The Faux-hawk, ponytail fright wig has generated enough interest that I swear "Go Daddy.com" is going to sponsor him next week wearing a thong. Except it's Tony Bennett week, so I bet we see him dressed like a gangster or something from the 40's.

Gwen was great. Well, she looked great, except no white shoes before Easter Gwennie. or after Labor Day. 2 strikes for that Fashion Faux Paux. I'll let it slide that your tights should never be darker than your shoes...it was a costume. I know, but if she were raised in Texas, as I was, she would have been laughed right out of Neiman-Marcus. It's just such blatant commercialism that these people who are really too cool for school, come on idol to promote their new tour. But hey, that's why she has the big bucks. And why her cd will fly off the shelves tomorrow. Check i-tunes tomorrow...and I bet she gets in the top 10 downloads, if she isn't already up there.

As I said earlier, Tony Bennett week...mmm. My girl Jordin will be fine. She is just so damn cute. Old lady Melinda won't have a hard time aging. Will her hair flip up or bob...one thing is for sure, her wide-eyed gummy grin self will sing her little heart out. Gina might have it tough, but maybe she can pull a sultry sexy act like singing something ala "My Funny Valentine". Does anyone remember the Grammys the year that Tony Bennett and the Red Hot Chili Peppers performed together. I will never forget the Tone-ster singing "Give it away, give it away now". And RHCP crooning... it was quite a musical moment. Too bad it was before YouTube.

And I'll close with a note to Sanjaya. Those fellow contestants ain't smiling at your apparent ability to survive. I'd watch my back, or my morning glass of juice. I feel like sending the contestants each a copy of Wedding Crashers and a case of Visine...remember that scene at the table with the eye drops in the wine glass. Watch out San-JayJay.

I'm FAMOUS!!! This blog is in USA Today!!!

I submitted a quote on Sanjaya to the editors of USA TODAY last week, commenting on what the buzZ is all about with Sanjaya. And they QUOTED ME!!! And they gave the url of this blog!!! So welcome to any USA Today readers joining us!

Article is below:

'Idol' stakes are high if Sanjaya wins

In the top 10: A Sanjaya victory would have many up in arms.
By Edna Gundersen, USA TODAY
The question tantalizes and terrorizes American Idol viewers: What if Sanjaya wins?
The toothy teen with the big hair — crafted into a fauxhawk Tuesday night — and minimal voice sailed into the top 10 last week, ensuring a spot on this summer's Idol tour. If he skates through tonight's elimination round (Fox, 9 ET/PT), the fuss over his confounding staying power is bound to intensify.


FANJAYA LOVE: Fans keep Sanjaya alive


In the short run, his presence makes for spirited debate, but if Sanjaya Malakar, 17, is standing in the winner's circle, "it would destroy credibility the show's built up in the past five seasons," music consultant Tom Vickers says. "Instead of 30 million viewers a week, it might draw 20 million."


A Sanjaya victory "will ruin the show," says fan Catherine Schloss of Folsom, Calif. "If he wins, I really don't think American Idol will be back."

Says Bryce Smart of Seattle, "The franchise would be cheapened greatly, perhaps beyond repair." He says Idol's integrity would be shattered if Sanjaya wins or even outlasts a superior talent such as LaKisha.

Radio host Howard Stern and votefortheworst.com have rallied Sanjaya support, but they "have very little influence when you're talking about 30 million votes," says Idol executive producer Nigel Lythgoe. "People with talent have always won it. We've lost really good people a little too early, and sometimes the Sanjayas, Chicken Littles and John Stevens have lasted a little longer perhaps."

An upset isn't unprecedented. The Eurovision song contest that launched ABBA globally in 1974 shocked many when voters gave the 2006 prize to Finnish horror metal group Lordi.

In addition to prank voters, Sanjaya draws tweens (such as last week's tearful fan Ashley Ferl). "Who's swooning? That little chick and millions just like her," says Idol blogger Cole Bronn (coledishesonidol.blogspot.com). "Sanjaya won a million votes with his sobbing when his sister got axed. What girl doesn't want that sweet guy to keep going? He'll never stomp your heart, will hang with you at the mall and hula-hoop with you into the sunset. He's got McDreamy hair. Oh, by the way, he sings OK."

OK enough to record a marketable album? Possibly, says USA TODAY's Idol coach Don Waller, suggesting the enlistment of Swedish pop maestro Max Martin, who propelled 'N Sync and Britney Spears.

"I see Sanjaya as a Leif Garrett or Shaun Cassidy. He can talk-sing light ballads and uptempo kid-friendly pop. Since looks are a big part of the sales job, they've got to take pages out of bubblegum. He has to do wistful puppy love stuff, no double entendres. Crotch-grabbing is a disconnect.

"I'm sure (BMG chief) Clive Davis can throw an army of producers at the kid. The guy can't sing? What's new? This archetype keeps coming back."

Contributing: Bill Keveney

Thanks Ken Barnes at USA TODAY for your inspiration to start this blog...to Edna for including me in her article, and to everyone that tells me I am funny, you brighten my day more than you know. xoxox. Cole

Ain't no Hollaback Girl gets it started.

Now look. I am not cool enough to even know what the hell a Hollaback girl is. I'm probably not even spelling it right. Lu or Amy, please tell me if you know!!! or anyone can email me at cbronn@ea.com.

So, LaKisha starts it off. I must first say I love Gwennie's outfit. Donna Summer tune is up. LOVE KiKi's dress and boots. Very becoming. KiKi's voice is great. But can you see her in concert? I just keep seeing Baptist Revival singer up there. Church Potluck and here's our little KiKi bringing us God's Word. Nice hair. Is that a wig? Still worthy of 4 Carries. Simon is right...it's time KiKi shaves some years off her performance. Good start to the show. Bank employees given her support. How nice.

Chris Sligh is next. I swear he is hysterical. POLICE song. MY ALL TIME FAVORITE BAND...Stinger. Don't butcher it. This is not working for me really. It's kind of painful. He seems a little out of breathe to me. And an awkward walker around the stage. This song just loses it when Sting isn't singing it. I don't know about picking popular songs that everybody in the world can sing it. Those curls are wacko. Ooh, Randy pulls "trainwreck" out. That's harsh. Hear the beat. Simon's going to nail you for more than that. OH< MY GOD I'm so right. Me and Simon sympatico tonite. Simon, not finished yet, not the Oscars. Hilarious.
2 Daughtreys Dawg. Chris S is on the chopping block.

Gina...I'll stand by you...GREAT song for Gina. And I lOVE this song. She is channeling her inner Chrissie. 4.5 Carries. I loved it. I think the whole package was great. Probably one of my favorite performances out of Gina. Randy, of course, agrees with me. Paula...same hairdo as Gwen tonite...they must have gotten a 2=fer at the salon. Simon, whoa, pulls one out. NICE. And again, I could be sitting on that stage. Gina...rock on girl. I might dial the votes for you tonite. Beats KiKi by a mile.

San=jay-jay...pulls No Doubt out. Oh God, massacre. holy mother of red hot mohawks, I have never seen anything so shiteous in my life. He looks like a freakin' Rooster. A very gay rooster. Forgot the words. I swear he's trying to throw this competition. He wants to go home. He's missing those hot wings his sister gives him at Hooters for free. This was a piece of shit performance. 5 Constantines Simon puts it into perspective and won't even comment. I just wish one of them had the nerve to say "Sanjaya, I think I just vomited a little in my mouth that was so bad"

Haley ...whoa Gwennie gives some harsh feedback and I like it. She is very opinionated. Is Haley trying to be this season's Kat McPheever? She has some unbelievable legs and is such a beautiful girl. I think she will do something when this is all over. Tough song, and I don't know if I liked that arrangement...and the pitchiness. It was aiiright for me. 3.5 Carries. Randy and me, on same pg. Pauler - agrees with Gwen Simon - Haylie if I'm being honest, I think I'd be worried tonite...I know he will say it. I just know it. Sweet but forgettable. Well, I agree. But I think Chris was worse. Chris S. is bottom of the pile for me tonite. Ryan tells her she looks WONDERFUL.

Phil Stacey - good move covering the chrome dome. POLICE...I'm loving tonite. This may be one of my favorite music weeks ever. He sort of reminds me of Leif Garrett tonite, pre-crack addict days. (am I dating myself or what). Good job. good rip in the middle of that song. Got some goose bumps. Best performance from Phil. 4.5 Daughtreys. Very solid performance. Randy, didn't I just type that dawg? Pauler, she looks pretty tonite...oh, is she talking? Simon, running low on blood sugar 'cause he's crabby. Oh, and now he is being nice.

Now, I am going to make a little observation. I think these judges are really trying to sway America on the voting. They are so worried, as am I, that San-JayJay is going to win. If that happens, the competition will change forever. Judges votes will start accounting for 50% next year, guaranteed.

Melinda picks a oldy tune, of course. Atleast they gave her a hip outfit and hair. That bob last week was heinous. well, her voice is undeniable as good. But I am not paying for this troll's cd or concert tickets. It ain't happening. She could easily be at the same church function with KiKi. 4 Carries Simon, hates the outfit. ha ha. He has no style whatsoever, except that he doesnt' change his style...maybe that's a good thing.

Blake. Doing the Cure. LOVE this song. My this night is Gwen and COLE"S inspirational tune night. I'm going to load my ipod as soon as this show is over. He looks good. love the hair and outfit. It's a little draggy for me...sort of boring and safe. No beat box. It was nice but not really something I would pick if I was wanting to wow the audience. He's going the sexyback route though, I can see it. 4.5 Daughtreys Randy, see Cole's comments Pauler: ditto Simon: Frontrunning guy.

Jordin. Oh good a fireball performance. Now see? Hip, with it song...and it will get the votes. I think she looks great. And she has a great voice. Not the best song to feature her voice but it was good. 4.5 Carries. I loved it. She was so damn hip and cute. This was a good Idol performance. And I can see people buying concert tickets. Jordin, good for you talking to them and staking your claim on what you want to do.

Chris R. vocal olympics. This is sounding good. Smooth. A little copy cat, to borrow Simon's last comment. Well, now he is winding up. Bring it. I hate his outfits. Never like his hair or face hair. Not sure what to think. 3.5 Daughtreys Judges were not impressed, like me. just blah for me.

I'm super impressed with Gwen and her comments. This show was great. Loved the music for sure.

So, I say Chris S. is out. or Hayley. Of course, San-JayJay is the worst of all. Those bastards at Howard Stern Show are keeping him in, along with that other website.

Nite Nite Idol-ites

Gwen Stefani Guest Mentors Tonite!

What the hell is Gwennie going to do with San-JayJay...besides bust a gut trying not to tell him he sux. Can you see her telling him...you go out there and rockit.

Gwen performs on Weds show and each one of the contestants has to sing a song that is from Ms. Stefani's inspiration list of artists. Should be good. Can't wait.

Is that McPheever? Look closely....

Oh Idol-Izers. I knew this show would eventually pick up the pace. I think the off screen antics of the media are way more fun than the actual show. Someone has squeezed Sanjay-jay into Kat's space...same crotchety pose! Love it.

Saturday Night Live - 2 Amer. Idols for price of 1

Well, Carrie Underwood, of course, is the sole reason I tuned in Saturday night. She was stellar, of course. Her outfit was a we bit Ho-ish, but hey, if she wants to shake her moneymaker in ivory satin shorts, power to her. He hair was flawless, and that all important lip gloss was perfection. She sang Wasted, as I predicted, and "Before He Cheats". It was great.

Now for the surprise AI appearance. They freakin' had a Sanjaya look-alike come out and interrupt Weekend Update. Wearing the same outfit, singing the same song. It was dead-on and so funny I almost fainted laughing. They had some little "crybaby" look alike in the crowd too. And DAN AKROYD in the crowd crying. ha ha.

Find it on YouTube, if you can, it's worth the search.

Hope everyone's weekend is going well.

Later...

Hooter's In the House

As you may recall, I noted Sanjaya's siser's particularly endowed chestage area. Well, it's good that she is cashing in on those mamms, with a high paying job at Hooter's. Does this get any funnier?

Cole

The Purple Telletubby is revealed...

Welcome to results night and after last night's Sanjaya...I can guarantee he will live another week.

So, after Peter Noone's performance, and studying those dance moves, I am 100% confident that he is the purple Telletubby. Or auditioning for a part in the Wiggles. Both huge Brit favorites. God was that boring. I expected a big purple dinosaur to come out.

Wow, Chris R and Stephanie are in the bottom 2. Wow. Shocking. Well, I'll go out on a limb and say, one of those 3 power voices of the ladies was bound to go...they were dividing all the votes. And Chris and Blake are dividing the white boy band guy vote. No shocker there. But I do believe Stephanie is going. Let's wait and see.

LuLu is going to perform...or screech as we saw last night. Wardrobe Malfunction here we come. If she gets through this without a nipple popping out, I'll be schocked. SHe reminds of Olivia Newton-John, a bit. But LuLu has smoked her share of cigarettes that is for sure. And hung at the pubs a little too long. She has passion for sure though. Melissa Etheridge and LuLu might cut a good gravelly record, with Bonnie Raitt! Raspy Records. Does anyone watch Absolutely Fabulous? This is the chick that Eddie has as her last paying client. Funny! Man, tonite's show seems like it is about 30 seconds long, not minutes. My how time flies when you are listening to goofy Brits.

Steph is out. I told you. No actually I said Phil was going. So, whatever. Well, Brandon last week, Stephanie this week. And we thought it would be a girl landslide. So far, it's even. THANK GOD THEY DID AWAY WITH LOSER SINGING OUT!!! Can't wait to find out who is on next week. That's it kids.

Chris Daughtrey...coming to the movies???

Looks like Daughtry is being included on the soundtrack to a major motion picture to be released this summer. Stay tuned. His album continues to do well and his summer tour will no doubt keep it in the rotation. Love him. Love him lots.

Looking forward to tonite's vote off? I am.

British Invasion Week Is Here!!!

Here we go with LuLu and Peter Hermit-guy. Well, I'll confess, I was born a few years before the British invasion 1962...so these songs were what my mom and dad were grooving down to when we went to the drive in picture show.

Haley: Looking good as always. She's putting on the sex kitten act tonite. Maybe she figures, Sanjaya is winning due to his hair appeal, so I'll toss my ta tas to the wind and stay in this competition another week. Helps to bounce around in Satin pajama top with no back. Ha! Simon feels the same. 3 Carries

Chris R. WOW, love this from the very start. I really think he is showing a huge amount of control. Very smooth, very JT. Judges agree. 4 Daughtrys

Stephanie: She is so pretty. I just wish her voice was more powerful. Reminds me of Latoya London. Song is sort of boring.

Why does Ryan have 2 mikes on? Is he airtraffic control at LAX now? He runs the radio airwaves, tv, so why not planes.

Blake Lewis is dressed like the Bill Murray in CaddyShack. Look at those plaid pants. Hilarious. I like this performance though. I like his smooth moves. He's a sexy little demon. Nice job, beat-boy. 4 Daughtrys Randy agrees with Cole. Pauler wants the record. Simon - props him up. It's all about the right song this week.

KiKi - well she chose Diamonds. It was ok...I think it was so odd to see her in that whole getup for me. I was distracted by the lounge act feel to me. And those fake nails. It just didn't seem James Bond to me. Judges: so far blah, blah, blah. Simon nails her. He agrees with Cole, as usual. He didn't like it like I didn't. 3 Carries. Shocker. See how this show has it's little twists and turns. But don't expect Sanjaya to come out with a breakthrough though. It's not called American Miracle.

Phil - singing Tabacco Road. wow, PHil is rockin it. You know, if he let his beard grow a little stubbly I might not feel like the paperboy was singing this to me. More Daughtry, less Dough Boy. It was aiiright. Judges: nasally, wiggly, annoying. 3.5 Daughtrys Ha, Simon is right...no grit

Jordin, my favorite is next. I loves her. Holy shit, LuLu is screeching like an owl. I actually like her though. She beats Diana Ross. 5 CArries...I couldn't ev en type. SHE "NAIL"ED THAT. I LOVED it. Amazing. The best of the night by far. She looked amazing. That was just so flippin' great. hard to believe she is just 17. Simon, what the hell, jump off the bridge. Hello, she didn't write the lyrics you dumbass. I just love seeing that dwarf Ryan next to Jordin.

Sanjaya: oh Lord. Where's this going to go? Oh he sux. How could he have butchered my favorite Kinks song. Who the hell is that little cryin' twit? Why do they keep showing that girl? Is she a Make A Wish kid? Sanjaya's sister has the biggest boobs ever. Simon won't even talk about Sanjaya. See, there are about a bizzillion little 14 year olds like her voting for him. God , he might make the finals if he keeps this shit up. Well, it was pretty funny to see this performance. Whatever.

Gina brings on The Stones. She looks great every week. Reminds me of cross between Joan Jett and the Black Hearts and Pat Benatar and The Pretenders. Hey, Gina said they read blogs. I wonder if anyone reads this one! ha ha. Paint it Black Gina. Well, not my favorite song. I guess this is pretty good. Not my favorite performance. 3.5 Carries. Forgettable for me. Simon had it right on that one for me.

Chris S. I love this song. Wow, I really liked the performance, Really. It was a good performance, entertainment wise. I liked it. It was kind of good. 4 Daughtrys. Judges: whatever the jammering between them tonite gets 1 Mikela.
Bringing chubby back. I like that. Good sign. Fro Patrol.

Melinda Doolittle (Ellen reminds us, no relation to the Doctor, ha ha) Hey Melinda? Do you give out towels with those showers? Spittin and singing. How embarrassing. CryBaby is back on the camera. My god that little girl has gotten more screen time that Ryan tonite. Sorry, I hated it. I just don't like her as my American Idol. I just don't. She ain't no Jordin. Whatever, Randy said she was the best. For me, I am just going to say, she is not the WHOLE package. She is talented, I'm not going to deny that. But, again, it's an old ballad song and just not American Idol. American Bandstand maybe. Will I buy tickets to the Melinda Doolittle concert. hell no. nor will I buy KiKi tickets. Right now, I would go see Jordin, Blake or Chris R. If I'm being perfectly honest, I'm not buying anyones cd from this season. I'm going to see Chris Daughtry, Carrie Underwood and Kelly Clarkson in concert in 07 and 08. Simple as that. Already saw Carrie once. When Kelly tours again, I will NOT miss it. And Daughtry is sold out everywhere. I missed him at Slim's after the SuperBowl.

OK, CryBaby is on the stage. What milionaire paid for their little girl to get on that stage. I can't wait to find out what daddy warbucks paid for baby girl to get on the stage. And yes, I will find out who the hell that girl is. But it is so damn cute to be that starstruck. I remember meeting my first American Idol in person, Ace Young. In Hollywood, and I screamed for about 2 hours. It was hilarious. He pulled me out of the crowd to have my picture taken with him. I was just so starstruck.

Hey Amy B...remember when we saw NSync backstage! Good times! Hope you're up and running for tonite's show!!!

I have to say, British Invasion week worked for me. Good songs. It was an entertaining show. I need more drama in the weeks to come though. Those judges are peripheral lately. Not integral. Bugging.

I'm afraid Phil is leaving us tomorrow. Sanjaya was just too damn nuts to not real in some votes.

Nighty Night Idol-Ites.

Carrie Underwood on Saturday Night Live 3/24

SET THE TIVO...BUY A NEW TAPE FOR THE VCR. CARRIE UNDERWOOD IS ON SNL THIS SATURDAY NIGHT!

Yippy Skippy. Carrie Underwood will be musical guest this week! She is only the 6 Country music star to be invited in the show's history. Go Girl!!! Take that Leann Rhimes, you bitch. I know that wasn't very Carrie of me, but when she announced it on CMT Insider this weekend, where she is substitute co-hosting for a vacationing Katie Cook, she said it with a particular smirk. She hates Carrie. Is jealous with a Capital J. Leann is a skank. There, I said it. She married a gay man named Dean and I almost threw up when she was announced the Nat'l Anthem singer at the only World Series Game I ever attended at Pac Bell a couple years ago. I've hated her since she and Tricia Yearwood duked it out singing the same song, years ago. Ok, so this posting is not "I hate Leanne Rimes, let me tell you why", so I'll get back to Carrie.

I bet she comes out looking like a little tart singing that "Before He Cheats" song. But let's hope and pray those writer's do a parady of American Idol and have her in a throw down with a Simon look alike. Or maybe Paula Abdul trys to get her to try some new Paula makeup line. Something where we get to see her other than just sing. I want Maximum Carrie Time.

More posting tonite.

Brandon on The Ellen Show yesterday

Well, Ellen takes on American Idol in the monologue and it was hilarious. She's a big fan, which I did not know, but should have figured. She loves music. So, she went through the top 11 and dissed Sanjaya and his hair, of course. She really likes Brandy and the JT look alike Chris. And of course gives shout outs to the obvious, Melinda, Jen Jr. and Jordin.

Brandon came on and sang the Cyndy Lauper-loo song. It was quite good actually. He's just too nice for this industry, not cut throat enough. He is just as honest as the day is long. It was good to see his spirit isn't crushed though.

Simon was on 60 minutes. I forgot to TIVO. Heard it was funny. Maybe it's on YouTube.

So British Invasion night is here. I hope there is some good music. Atleast they all stick to something I can hum along to. I hate when they sing a song I don't know...makes it hard to know if they are screwing it up royally or not.

Bye!

Sanjaya...certainly enjoying his 15 minutes of fame

Every season, the odd bird seems to catch the media spotlight and it just seems to stick. Maybe it's what fascinates me about human nature...what fascinates humans. There is just a rash of buzz on the internet as to why Hello Kitty hasn't run out of lives yet. And the brain trusts of analysts have come to one scientific conclusion. It's his hair. They've interviewed the on-set stylist over at AI and he reports that in his previous 5 seasons at Idol, NO contestant has been as obsessed with his hair. And evidently his efforts have not been wasted...the 14 year old girls are swooning. They don't care if he can't sing...he looks cute on stage. Have any of you ever watched the Disney Channel. He sings better than most of those little Mouseketeers. To put it politely, pitchy is not a term they are familiar with, nor do they care. They like his hair...period. And Simon is sick to death of hearing about it and his hula hooping. He's the one sweatin' like a whore in church now. Imagine if this little idiot makes it much further and they have to start thinking about him making it on tour!!! Putting together a show with his weakass vocals? Or worse yet, a possible record contract if he were to win...which will never happen because I do believe the woman are strong enough to prevail.

Which brings me to Melinda. I know everyone is enthralled with little gummy grin, bright eyes Troll-a linda. But I'm not. She has not performed a song that was produced in this Millinium yet. When she busts out a Beyonce tune or anything of the current modern day Billboard top 100, then I will give her a chance.

Now let's talk about Diana Ross. She was awful. That dress with those red sequin platform heals...she reminded me of cross between Satan and a Vampire. It was just so overly Diva. I guess I just felt like her drunken swaying was going to land her on her ass at any moment, and at her age...hello broken hip. Why the hell would you put yourself in skin tight dress, fat ass platforms, dress 7 inches too long so you have to kick to be able to not step on it, and then sing a crap song. It was just a recipe for disaster.

This week...British Invasion week. I'm about as excited for this as I was when I found out I was being audited by the IRS. Who the hell even cares about the guest judges...Herman Hermits dude and LuLu. Let me remind you...LuLu is 58 years old. Diana Ross is 82...Herman? Who knows. What is this Geriatric Idol? I think Simon slept with LuLu, so that's why she gets to come 'cross the pond and hang. Jeez, are they out of money over there at Fox. Isn't there anyone good with an album to promote? Where the hell are Faith Hill and Tim McGraw...Soul2Soul on over her and get your sexy groove on on this stage for Country week please. Let's see some real stars in a hot genre.

I'd be happy if they'd just drag the cast of Grey's Anatomy on stage and let them karaoke. It beats the hell out of LuLu. McDreamy singing ... oh my god...I'm just like those little girls voting for Sanjaya...it's all about the hair.

More later....

Sanjaya-Sweatin' Like a Whore in Church

I am now calling him Hello Kitty...because he has 9 lives. Should have been gone weeks ago. But, he didn't forget his words, so I guess that is worse ....THAN SINGING EVERY NOTE OUT OF TUNE LIKE A TINY WEEK KITTEN??? I don't think so, but alas, he's still in. Brandon, sorry dude, but your days were numbered. You just can't sing into a microphone loudly enough. I think you can sing in the studio maybe, and you're super nice...good luck buddy.

Jordin Sparks. Whowza...did she look like Callie on Grey's Anatomy tonite or what? I thought she was beautiful...and that is why I am happy I picked her to win it all in our office pool. I think her personality is going to win over Troll Doll and JHud Jr.

Well, can't wait to see who is next week's guest sale-ebrity. Who has a tour or cd to promote? New house to pay for? Mmm. Don't know, but trust me, they will be hawking something.

Nitey Nite Idol-Ites

Review of the Show...what did you think?

I tell you, these people are the most milk toast, blandest bunch of yahoos I've ever seen. If I see one more "gasp, oh my gosh, oh really, wide eyed, I can't believe it" interview with Ryan, I'm going to whip my remove at the tv. I want to see someone look at those judges and say "do you need to have your ears cleaned". Or "You got that right...that's what I am talking about." Please, show some damn personality. Remember that little Paris chick, calling Kevin Covais Chicken Little? Remember those duffus fools that said stupid stuff that made Ryan blush? Oh for the days. So, I'm begging you ... idol contestants...try to remember your words and find your reason for wanting this. Find your soul, as Lady Di says.

Now for the show...I wanted to write it when it was over, instead of in real time, because I want to watch the performances, now that they have room to breathe. Unfortunately, some of them stayed in their little box. And some I wish had missed the stage entrance altogether...hello Sanjaya. His wig was the best part of his gig. Poor little boy, I think he's trying to get booted off. Sadly, there are a bunch of 12 year olds that think he's SaDreamy. So, I predict another boy will go tomorrow night. I think Brandon has done his last frontman gig. It's to the back with the band now. Maybe Chris Sligh and his Coldplay gig will seal his demise. Dawg, that was painful, and I liked that guy. Look I can't even waste the key strokes talking about the guys. As far as I'm concerned they should all be voted off systematically one-by-one like a Survivor tribal council where the woman win every challenge. Those guys are just drab, except maybe Blake Lewis...but even he and his Michael Jackson moves turn me off.

Now for the girls. I want to root for Gina...but I don't think she can hold a candle to Jordin, Melinda or LaKisha KiKi. So, Melinda just has a great voice, no debate. But star quality? Mmm...not so much. Sweat pants + tennis shoes + OCD tendancies = backup singer or Broadway. I just don't see her selling out the concert arena, or even Bimbo's. Now, let's look at KiKi. She is strong, but she make have peaked too quickly. I think this is what was Chris Daughtry's demise. People will stop voting for her. She is on top and has nowhere else to go, except where? That would be down. Or other's could get closer, which means she is no longer the huge front runner. Seeing the picture? This is the demise that Tamyra Grey, Kimberly Locke, Jennifer Hudson, Mandisa all of these strong woman never won. And I think had Fantasia been up against someone besides Diana DeGarmo...like say Chris or Bo Bice or Carrie U...Fantasia would have gotten 2nd place. Jordin...now this little girl can fly. She has "it". She's like "That's So Raven" ... Raven Simone. I bet you she get's alot of Raven fan votes. And she is going to keep growing... she has not peaked and therefore, will keep getting alot of positive feedback. I'm putting it out there that she is going to be a sleeper. Stephanie, well she is great. But too much like Fantasia...nothing new here in looks and less personality than any of the other 3 strong woman.

Haley...what a pretty little girl. I really really liked her performance. And I hope she gets a chance to stick around and keep growing as well. I hope those producers are shaking in their shoes at how they screwed up this year with this less than stellar Top 12. God, they must have seen 100,000 people across America. And this is what we are left with. Mmm. Some head's would role if I was running this show.

So, that's it for me. I think Chris S. or Brandon will be packing their bags tomorrow night. I hope it's Brandon.

Until tomorrow...

Idol Moves to the Big House TONITE!! Kodak Theatre

How could I have let so many days go by with that Hooker Face Heather Mills as my lead photo? What was I thinking.

Truth be told, my wireless internet service took a dive on me. Bummer. So, how am I supposed to surf and watch tv? Not possible. Well, I have to admit, I'm sort of looking forward to tonite. And you know why? Because I think the damn idol people have been holding out on us. I think they have been coaching them to suck up to now, and holding back the horses. Tonite they are going to let the big dawgs run. Wishful thinking? Of course. Naive, well yes. Hopeful, what else is there.

So, they will have had more time to shop, hang with Diva Ross, get coached by a stylist, etc. They may be feeling like stars, and let's hope they start acting like them. Don't talk to me about your OCD tendencies Melinda. Please. And Blake better have packed up that goofy alternate ego fool he brought out last week. Jimmy Bob Jackass, or whatever his lame name was.

Gina girl, you got to represent the rocker. We need you to channel your inner Kelly Clarkson, Amy Evanescence chick, or whoever ... and bring it. BRING IT, I tell you. Somebody needs me to jump on their bandwagon tonite, or I may have to ditch this shit and write about America's Top Model or something like that. Kidding...I won't abandon Idol. I can't. It's just not in me to not have Ryan Seacrest to stare at and wonder... Gay, Not Gay? Gay...Not Gay? I'm just fascinated. Simon, Ass, Not an Ass, Ass, Not an Ass? Pauler, drunk and disorderly? Sad and PItiful? Randy, no wondering there. He's just a cool cat, but he figured out how to eat around that gastric bypass didn't he?

More later when they get the ball rolling tonite. Fingers crossed for some good music and entertainment. It's that so much to ask?

Perez Hilton web link is off the blog

Well, Idol Ites, I know that some of you are aware of my affection for Perez Hilton. Well, the shine is off that penny. He has publicly dissed Randy, Ryan and Simon on his website. He hates Idol. Therefore, he's off my blog. I have my reputation. However, I have no problem surfing his site on my own for funny pictures, that I will occasionally share with you. In my last post I mentioned Heather Mills. Seems some of you do live under a rock and didn't know she is currently getting a divorce from Sir Paul McCartney and is about to appear on Dancing with the Stars...or more aptly "Watch a Clumsy Football Star dance in tight clothes with beautiful woman". Anyway, here's a picture of her, driving while video taping the paparazzi. Backstory: Years ago, Princess Diana accidentally set off the burglar alarm at her castle, and when the emergency vehicles were speeding to her home, there was a terrible accident. One of the vehicles struck Heather Mills (she was a model at the time, not famous) and she was badly injured, resulting in the loss of her lower leg. She is very open about it, and continued her modeling career with a prosthetic. So, now you know. And British citizens hate her ass. Goldigger seems to be the biggest issue.

The Final Twelve Finalist Revealed TONITE!!!

Well, I'm sort of excited tonite, but it's only because Carrie Underwood is singing her 5th top hit "Wasted". Whoo Hoo!

This final twelve is going to have to step it up over the next several weeks if they ever expect me to part with $9.99 for their cd. Not to mention sucking up precious space on my ipod. It's getting close to full and I'm getting really picky with my downloads.

So, here's Ryan to start the show and he is dressed like a pallbearer tonite. There's a big announcement tonite, he says. I am going to take a big guess and say it won't be that cool to us. I think they are making muchado about something that will feel like a "kinda cool thing...". Like, the finalist get to spend the night at Graceland or something.

Here we go with the head lopping. Lakisha and Blake are pulled out first. Top runner boy and girl. One of you will work with Diana Ross and one is in Top 12. So, no shocker, they are both in. Diana Ross next week. That should be fun. Ryan wammies Chris Sligh with an "after the break" heartstopper. And he's in. Another no shocker. Jordin, ok how are they going to make this mysterious? Oh, good, they just slide her in like butter. This is good, they are getting through the bullshit quickly. Phil Stacey is up...now this one is a coin toss for me. I want him to stay because I want 2 or 3 others to go first. Yeah!!! He's in. He cried. OH, for the love of Mikela...with Jared leaving it means we are stuck with Sanjaya or Sundance. I hate this sometimes. But, out this round or next, whatever. And now the ever-painful "I've been kicked in the gut, now I must pretend I am emotionless and sing" exit performance...why oh why do they do this shit?

Phone quiz.. fingers on the buzzers Idol-Izers...here's the question...who has the #1 album this week...Ace Young, Kevin "chicken little" Covais, or Chris Daughtry. Duh. Come on. The question should have been "One of these American Idols HAS an album." Forget the #1 part. I hate when they act like we are stupid. Jeez. Here's next week's question so you guys can do a little research. "One of these American Idol judges is a black man that once sang with Journey. Randy, Paula or Simon".

CARRIE CARRIE CARRIE CARRIE UNDERWOOD ...I LOVE HER. ISN'T SHE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL??? I just love that little Okie girl making it big. 5 CARRIES and a bonus "go girl" for her awesomeness in makeup, lip gloss, wardrobe, and overall stellarness.

Chris and Melinda are in. No surprise. Three places left. Antonella is gone. Stephanie stays, of course. I am actually sad to see Boobies go. I not sure what I will miss the most...typing Boobies or her bad singing and laughing my ass off. Well, I don't care who it is, it's sad to see anyone's dreams dashed. But, as Joan Cusack said to Melanie Griffith in Working Girl, and I quote, "Just 'cuz you dance around and sing in your underwear, don't make you Madonna." And, so it goes Boobies Barbarella, back to dancing on the bars in your college town.

Uh oh, the Drag Queen is going to bust a gut. Haley is stoic. Drag queen is out. Pawler is jaw dropped. My husband is crying, he is laughing so hard at listening to Ryan say "Tonite is definitely the most intense we've had". Well, I can't say I thought we needed a Drag Queen in our Top 12, although she is a pretty one. And listen, who are we kidding...all these chicks are going home eventually, except LaKisha. So, the sooner they get on with it, the better. And here's an idea...maybe Dawg will put her on Travis Tritt's album.

Ok, I'm going straight to hell for making fun of Idol with my crazy comments about sleeping at Graceland. They are giving back. Well, they must have watched Oprah's special last week. So, kudos to these people and Fox and all the sponsors. It's nice. Quincy Jones is writing a song. Borat is making an appearance. Gwen Stefani (I smell a catfight with Paula. I guarantee, Paula will wear some leapard skin gitup trying to look him with Gwen in the house), Michael Buble, Bono, wow...sounds good to me.

Sundance or Sanjaya. I say Sundance is out. And there is going to be some crying. And "Sanjaya the Shits" is going to the Top 12, only to be voted off next week. See I told you...Sanjaya is in. And the crowd sounds quiet and confused....oh, I should clap now? Pawler is pissed. Simon is pissed. OK, so maybe Randy will put him on the Travis Tritt album too, with the Drag Queen.

Sundance sings again. And now Eddie Vedder reaches for his tv remote and whips it at his new plasma screen tv, 'cuz you know, he broke his last one Monday night when Sundance sang his song the first time. Poor Pearl Jam. They used to not let their songs be sung on this show, and now we all know why. Ok, where's my Chris music. OH yeah@!! Here it is.

Well, here's our Top 12 and I'm underwhelmed, as I started this out night whining. Tuesday is Diana Ross night, 2 hrs, and those boys do not stand a snowball's chance in hell of channeling that DIVA. Can't wait to see the Beat Boxer try his chops on Love Child, or Stop in the Name of Love. I hope they work it out Dawg. I really do. I want to see a competition.

Nighty Night Idol-Ites.

Week 3: Girls are back to show us some talent!

Well, Pawler's missing at the intro. Let's hope this is an omen to fun and wacky stuff to come. I want to see Ryan slip off the stage just once.

Ok, so Pawler surfaces and Jordin is up. She sings a great performance to lead out the show. She's got a great energy. She gets 4 Carries. I like her. Judges: nothing unexpected

Sabrina: I don't really like her, but she's ok. I just can't get past the spaghetti hair wig. It's just too much for me. 2 Carries

Boobies: I love Corinne Bailey Rae. She is going to ruin this for me. Boobies, you can't handle the truth, and I'm afraid Simon is going to give it to you. Well, I think this is really weird. They are trying to talk her into quitting, or admitting that others are better and she should be voted off. And SImon actually bringing up the media hits. 2 Mikelas

Ryan looks hot in a turtleneck..oddly as the temp tops 75 in LA he dresses for winter. 5 Daughtrys

Haley, singing Faith Hill. Not a good plan to pull out country on non-country week, for Nashville's sake. This is not good, I worry we might be delivering another Mikela. But she is so cute. I hate to give her a Mikela. 2 Carries. Maybe she should have done a backflip into the audience and then 3 Carries. POD brings in the high school musical comments, and the fact that he can't remember her name. Simon, finally admits that he hates Country,

Boy tonite they are really trying to influence the vote. Me Thinks they are looking at the top vote getters and aren't happy with the spread.

Stephanie, I know she is going to tear up this song. It's a great song for her voice. Great performance. I really liked it. Chaka Khan is a toughy and I think she did a good job. 4.5 Carries. Dawg doesn't agree w/me. Pawler: hate her goldness tonite, by the way, is kind of soft tonite POD: I think I agree that she needs to find her style.

JenJr. is up next. She looks really nice tonite. Ok, here is the Whitney song that was written by Diane Warren for My Bodyguard...and if anyone can sing it, and she is, it's Jen Jr. This is the song I mentioned in the post about Carrie Underwood's current single, written by Diane Warren. Ok, I think she sang this better than Whitney, pre-crack whore days. Certainly without a doubt in the post-crack ho days. Oh, my lord someone needs to settle down the sisterhood in the audience. She's got the Yo factor. Tonite Simon says she is beaUTIFUL. Oh, I think they are trying to sway this thing to LaKisha so they can capitalize on what they lost with JHud. They want to ride the JHud wave with LaKisha. Mmm. Hmm. They are as transparent as swiss cheese these producers of this show. They have been burned by the Taylor. See, those people like to sit around in Alabama and vote for Trailor, Rueben, and Bo, but they don't really turn those phone calls into music downloads. They'll spend $40 a week in text messages, but not 99 cents on a song, nor do they head to Wal-Mart to buy cds.

Gina has a good attitude. Pickles and Pillows and all. Is this Evanescence? Now this is YO factor to me. I think this chick might be bringing her best performance tonite. And she got a tongue piercing. I love her hair, her bounce and the pink bra is better than the pink streak in her hair, Rough ending. She's a rocker chick. Finally, a real emotional performance.
Dawg: always keeping it real. yes, it was an Amy Evanescence singer. Pawler: good feedback POD: Good comments...wow, Simon was probably the most sincere I've seen him. He really liked her. Ooh, I think she shouldn't kiss Simon's ass too much and alienate Paula and Dawg. Loved her grey sparkly eyeshadow.

Now Melinda Doolittle is up. She's a freak. She gets 3 Mikela's just for the stupid OCD story. You are not a WOMAN, you are part troll and part cupie doll. I don't like you anymore and you're hitting skid row soon. Why do I need you when I have Jordin, Stephanie, and LaKisha to sing all the bluesy, whitney and Celine songs. I don't. 2 Carries. DAWG: you are deaf Pauler: whatever Simon: Little tiger, my ass. I'm sorry, I just don't like that act. I don't agree with the judges on this. OOH< Simon digs at Jennifer again, with the stepping stone comment. Ok, I'm sorry but gummy grin Melinda Doolittle is just not playing for me.

Well, it goes without saying, we should have seen our last Boobies performance. And I'm afraid Haley will join her. But if Boobies stays, then I think it should be Sabrina Sloan. If I'm being perfectly honest, Sabrina sort of reminds me of a drag queen. A really pretty one.

OK, now I'm so excited the new Fox Show, The Wedding Bells is coming on. Looks f'ing hilarious. Teri Polo (Meet the Parents) and a bunch of other people making fun of my favorite day of the year...a wedding. Those that knew me at the time of my wedding understand. I planned and did every detail of my wedding. No bridesmaids welcome. Controll freak Project Manager...and I was not a bridezilla. I waited until after the wedding to blackball my photographer to the mansion! ha ha. And I made my cake baker a star. She's got her own store front in Napa now, and I like to think it was all my recommendations to other wedding planners I ran across after the wedding. yes, I briefly thought about wedding planning as a career change. Never had the nerve to do it. I can to the realization that I really wanted to only re-create my wedding for other brides. I was suffering from post-traumatic wedding syndrome. Nothing to plan or look forward to when "the honeymoon was over"...so I picked myself up and started planning the perfect one year anniversary celebration. Problem-solved. Ok, so thanks for indulging me in my little trip down memory lane. Twelve years later and I can still remember that damn photographer telling my guests to stop taking pictures of me. Stupid hooker face.

Week 3: 8 Boys Sing...but will we care?

Let's hope so, or it's going to be a long night. I want someone to blow my socks off tonite. Remember, I'm writing in real time, so follow along....ooh Ryan said they are going to announce a big event on Thursday! Excitement. Love those teasers.

Oh my God. Jimmy Walker Blue...what the hell character impression was that? Blake Lewis, who told you that was a good idea? Ok, so you're making it up with this great performance. He really seems so comfortable performing. He's really smooth. He's a groovy dude. 3.5 Daughtrys to start the show. Might have gotten 4 if Jimmy Walker Blue had stayed home. Dawg - cool Pawler - nice hair POD (Prince of Darkness) - nice

John Mayer and Pearl Jam up - but what? With SANJAYA and Sundance. God I can hear Eddie and John screaming at the tv right now. NOOOOO!!!!! Please don't let these losers butcher my music. Too bad. Holy Shit. Sanjaya's had his hair styled by Eva Longoria's stylist. This is a girl trapped in a man's body. I have to say, this is the best song he has picked. Still, a nice karaoke and nothing more, and I'm being kind. I like his new wig actually, I'm all over the place on this shit. Whatever. I need some chocolate. Dawg - needs chocolate too Pawler - reading her mind "uh, i don't know how mean I can be, because I haven't had enough to drink yet" POD - he's gonna slay him. here we go...not as ghastly as last week. Hoola hooping, Pawler hairstyling...ha ha...it's a singing competition. Those judges are trying to get him booted.

Sundance -starting out talking about his fat. That's cool. Sundance...no pearls in your jam. You suck. He sort of reminds me of meatloaf. The singer...not the food. DAWG: what you love about it? Crazy. Pawler: midway groove POD: lost your charm this week. Generic bar singer. I didn't get it either POD. 2.5 Daughtrys

Chris: More fat comments. Today's show is brought to you by TrimSpa. Hey, I like this song. I'll buy this in Itunes at the end of the show, I hope they tell us who sings it. I think it's Keith Urban, actually. I think I own this already. But I digress. This dude could be a Justin Timberlake like dude. Hey, it is Keith Urban. Yeah, I love him. Chris did it for me. I liked it. 4 Daughtrys from me. Judges, nothing worth typing

Hey, did you see the promo for The Wedding Bells? Looks funny. Delta Burke was in there. Funny lady. Ok, back to Idol.

Jared Cotter: Stevie Wonder. Can't go wrong with the Wonder-ful. Oh, he has such nice teeth. Like his outfit too. And back to his voice...it's really nice. But I'm not really super moved. He's pretty good, but no heart...he's gotta give me some personality to back up that voice. Give me a reason to love you. Give me a reason to root for you. Emote. Not remote.
Judges: Agree with Cole. Wow, I hit the nail on the head with this one. Me and SImon are looking to be W'ow'd. Look at the first sentence of this blog.

Ok, Brandon and the piano, impressive. Well, I liked the song, but he could have rocked it a bit more...moved around a little, I hate the way he hangs on the mike. 3 Daughtrys Judges: I agree. But I don't know why they would be nervous for him after Sanjaya and Meatloaf, for god's sake.

Phil, bald guy. That's all you could come up with interesting things? Oh, my ...what the f(*(*&* key is he singing this song in? He started off like he was imitating someone. He's in a bad range...like he's faking it. He should have never sang this damn song. I like this guy, but man, what the hell was that. 2 Daughtrys Sad. Judges: Dawg - inline with me Pawler - ditto POD- please don't slam him. We really want Sanjaya to go. POD is picking on hats and eyes. Yep, I agree with Simon.

Chris Sligh - Sounds GREAT from the start. I LOVE THIS> He is bringing it. PERFORMANCE OF THE NIGHT. 5 DAUGHTRYS. I really liked that shit. Dawg - well whatever, gave him a prize Pawler - must be on low blood sugar, and they don't like his looks. They don't want him to win. Ooh, Pawler slammed him POD - disagrees with me as well. Well, I am off from them. I really liked that. I think this guy is sharp. I like him.

Ok, underwhelmed is the understatement of the night. If I'm being perfectly honest, I am not rooting for anyone in this competition yet. No one is sticking out that I like. There are no Carrie Underwoods or Chris Daughtrys yet. None.

Good news, Carrie Underwood is coming on Thursday. She will sing "Wasted" no doubt. It's only about the 5th hit from her cd. I've actually worn that damn cd out. It screams when I pick it up out of the case...my cd player display reads "Really Cole, are you going to play this cd again...buy a new one. I'm tired of this"...and spits it out. Anyway, back to reality. This is a great song, writted by Diane Warren, and if you don't know who she is look it up. She a bizzillionaire songwriter to the stars.

Till tomorrow, when the real talent hopefully shows up.

Chicago Declares today is Jennifer Hudson's

Chicago Mayor proclaims today Jennifer Hudson Day and she treated them with a little song in appreciation. She also visited her high school and carried her Dream celebration back to her fellow citizens. She's probably walking Oprah's dog with the Big O this evening, scheming as to how Harpo can get a piece of the Jennifer pie. If she's smart, Jennifer will join that Angel Network and flap those wings all the way to the bank.

Other breaking hot idol news:
Who's this???

Yow-zah Dow-zah. Now if Kellie Pickler had used her money for a total enhancement like Mr. Elliott...whew. He looks great. And word on the early buzz-0=meter is his cd will not disappoint his fans. Did you know his fans are known as "Yaminions". There are websites!!! But will he gain new fans? That remains to be seen on the R&B/Pop charts.

Kellie Pickler is nominated for Best New Vocal Female Artist, but Miranda Lambert will win at the ACM awards. Not good press on her 40 year old makeup, breasts that seem to be wearing her, not enhancing her, and overall "I'm a Mess" personality. Please don't let her pick up where another blonde bombshell just dropped off.

Well, gotta go. They are about to call off the numbers for the big lottery mega millions and this very well could be my last post as a poor working girl. Fingers crossed. Hope we have some good idol watching tonite!!!

Simon, if you're reading this...

Ok, enough is enough, you fashion-challenged Prince of Darkness. I've read and seen enough this weekend of you having issues with Jennifer for saying American Idol was a stepping stone. So sorry she didn't check with you on semantics and how you would have liked to have been thanked when she picked up her Oscar. Let me remind you, Mr. Cowell, you had nothing to do with DREAMGIRLS. Your only significant part in Jennifer's Idol experience was to insult her, tell her she was nowhere near strong enough to sing Jennifer Holiday, and belonged back on a cruise ship. Any normal person would have let those personal insults crush their spirit, but Jennifer told Barbara Walters, it just challenged her. And that is why her shelf is now sporting the Oscar, and the SAG and the Golden Globe, not because you put her through to Hollywood.

And what's even more pathetic is your recent comments on Taylor Hicks. You've said nothing about him until it's become apparent his cd is going to tank in sales...and you don't want to be attached to him. So now you want to take the "I told you so" attitude, saying you never liked him, and Chris Daughtry was your favorite. I remember you calling Chris a one-trick pony one week. And that was about 2 weeks after you applauded him for being true to himself. Mr. Cowell, you are incapable of integrity and for admitting when you are wrong, unless of course Oprah calls you on it and it means you get a segment on her show. You'll say anything for that kind of exposure, you media whore.

Simon, stick to the judging and finding the best. Your show has credibility, and you don't need everyone out there kissing your ass about it, every time THEIR talent and business acumen gains them accolades. Jennifer starts on her new cd next month. I think I'll send her a few ideas for how she can thank you properly in the liner notes.

Former Idols - Some are still plugging away...

Well, Entertainment Weekly's April 14 issue will show us what some of our past favorite idols have been doing. I personally have a couple that really like. I loved Kimberly Locke's cd and still listen to it occasionally. I heard it on the rotation at Macy's just the other day. She has a new cd coming out this month as well. She came in 3rd to Rueben and Clay. The other favorite of mine (besides the megastars that are of course my favorites, Kelly, Carrie and Chris) is Josh Gracin. He was the marine that had a great country voice. He has a couple of great songs I listen to all the time.
Other shockers: Diana DeGarmo is on Broadway in Hairspray. She's been there for a couple of years. Big Success. Now she will be joined by Fantasia who is going to Oprah-land and star in The Color Purple. Constantine Maroulis is in NY as well. Probably Off-Bway. LaToya London moved to LA and has just finished a film. Mario Vasquez, the guy that quit because he figured he could do it better alone...releases his first cd this month. And it has big backing. Could be good. Not holding breath. Carmen Rasmussen has grown up and hopes to follow Carrie and Puffy Pickler to Nashville. Looks like Carmen might have gotten a little puffing up in the booby dept. as well. Trenyce has made it big in Russia. Frenchie Davis news is included...yawn. And a couple of others have used their 15 minutes of fame to keep going. The weirdest one is the disappearance of Bo Bice. I just haven't heard a word about him since the Idol tour after he lost to Carrie. I thought he was awesome. It's weird. Even Bucky Covington has a video coming out on Country Music.
And I called this one. Kelly Clarkson and Reba McIntire are going to be in a CMT TV Crossroads special. They are big friends now and were interviewed on CMT Insider this weekend. She hysterical (Kelly) and still so untouched by fame. Reba laughs at her. While I'm on country, Carrie is nominated for 3 awards in the next country show. ACM or CMA or whatever. She up for Female Video of the Year for her "Before He Cheats" song. Carrie will be performing at the Dixon Coiunty Fair again this May. I saw her last year...it was a really great show...outdoor small venue...very fun on a early summer night. Good fair too!

American Idol - The Video game on PS2 ROCKS

Well, it's happened. I'm hooked. I played the American Idol video game at work tonite, and it was the most hysterical thing ever. Those of you that don't know me, well, I'm fortunate to work at a video game publisher and we actually play video games at work. It's still as stressful as if I worked on the floor of the NYSE. Anyway, today I became a rockstar. I came went over to where they were playing Guitar Hero and American Idol. So, they put the game in and begged me to play. Well, I've never even gone to a karaoke bar, and they are shoving this microphone in my face. So, I muster up some courage and think about it. Then I saw it...Kelly Clarkson's BREAKAWAY...and I knew it was my moment. So, I looked at Matt and said fire it up.

Now this is pretty sophisticated. You sing into a microphone and you have to hit the notes, and how well you are doing shows up on a meter. And you get points for getting words right, tone right, etc. And the crowd rates you too. Anyway, after you sing, the judges come up...and its Randy, Simon, and some make believe Paula. I guess she was not too keen to be in a game...big mistake, this thing is popular. Anyway, the Randy and Simon are DEAD ON and speak in their actual voices. So, I finish up Kelly and holy moly, they give me a golden ticket to Hollywood!!! Whoo Hoo!!!

So, now it's Matt's turn. He doesn't make it to Hollywood...song failed. Boo. So, it's back to me again. So, I figure, well, I don't suck as bad as everyone else...so I'll try again. And then I see Nickelback Photograph. I sing that song so loud in my car, I nearly shatter the windshield. So, I let it rock. And Randy and Paula give me big props. It's so funny I nearly pee. Then Simon creams me. Says it was the worst performance of the night. Then out of no where he says "I hope I don't regret this, but I'm putting you through to the next round!" Yes, people, I made it through Hollywood week. I'm into the semi-finals.

Unfortunately, I had to go back to work on a logo design...I'm borrowing the neighbor kids Ps2 this weekend and buying that game and practicing all weekend. I'm going to win that game.

More later...

Week 2: The Vote Results are In

Just to be clear, I write this in real-time. My reactions as it is happening on my TIVO. So, you kind of have to read as it is a stream on my conscience. Hope that makes sense. Here we go...First guy off...no surprise. Nick. Nothing to say really, except I predicted it.

Now Ryan does his run through of the woman. And Alaina is booted.Ryan just reminded us Alaina sang "I Ain't Ready to Make Nice" Ryan, correction here .... who are you kidding?...she may have known the words to that song, but she did NOT sing that song. Bye Bye CryBaby.

Well, it's finally happened...one of the losers can't do their sing out. CryBaby broke down...lived up to her name. I finally know how AI deals with this, they pump up the volume on the backup singers.

Holy moly...EARTHQUAKE!!! Wow, a roller just went through my living room. How dare the earth move while I am trying to watch my show!

Back to CryBaby...Sundance Head is looking at her like he can't believe his eyes. She's American Idol roadkill. You just can't bare to look away.

Here comes the highlight of tonite for me. Pick Pickler. Please don't sing that red high heels song...it's Upchucky Cheesy.

Well bless her little heart. Pickler boughts herself some big puffy boobies with her record money. Wow, she looks great. Ryan asks, "Have you spent your money on anything?" Oh my God, Ryan is calling her out on her booby purchase. Calling her out...I tell you. She replies as innocent as a kitten "Shoes". Is that ALL you have spent your money on, shoes? , Ryan presses her. Mmm Hmm Replies Kellie "used to be a B, now she's a hefty D" Pickler. Well, I say you go girl, and take your tatas to the top of the cw charts. She looks pretty, fake boobs and all. Excuse me, I have to stop writing so I can stop my husband from yelling at the tv, "nice tits Kelly." Now he is quizzing me on exactly how big do I think they are? Dope. I can tell he just wants to get it right when talking at the water cooler with his buddies tomorrow at work. He wants my professional boob size judging opinion so he doesn't sound stupid. How cute. Dopey Dope. But I digress.

Sanjaya vs. AJ. It's going to be AJ because Sanjaya was in top 4 last week. Let's see... who the hell is voting for MopHead? Sanjaya is shocked because he knows he sux. Oh, this is nuts. We can't contribute this to the vote for the worst people because they are voting for Sundance Head and Antonella. actually, I think Mopsy wants to go home. I think he misses sissy and mommy and his high school drama club meetings. Mopsy is Home Sicky.

Awww AJ. He has a nice voice. Go be a backup singer AJ. You're too cute. Atleast he can keep his composure during singout unlike CryBaby. Speaking of CryBabies...we have a new one. Sundance. He's crying and so it Melinda DoAlot. By the girl's reaction to him leaving, I think he was a ladies man, indeed.

Ok, Nick, AJ and Alaina...who will be the 4th..It better be crazy Leslie Hunt. Ooh, pulling out the 3...Vote for the Worst is going to save Boobs Barbarella. Girls are not too happy. Spooky Red knows her number is up. Jordin looks great tonite. Love her hair straightened. Lord Jordin is more upset than Leslie. What? The judges are acting like this is a travesty. And I guess if I had to pick Leslie or Boobs, who would I have booted...definitely Leslie. Sorry...but atleast Boobs entertains me when she is bad. Red didn't, but I think she is a nice person.

Oh, I love Chris Daughtry. It's so exciting to get to hear him every week in the loser parade. Gina, pull it together, they didn't just cut off your right arm, just sent a contestant home. And guess what, more to come, so suck it up and be happy it ain't you. Well, that's it for another week peeps.