Houston...we have a problem...

I forgot to tell you of my middle of the night crisis last night. Remember we put in ceiling fans yesterday? Well, Bella does not like the celing fans. She thinks they are aliens landing on her head. We woke at 1:30 am listening to her cry. We couldn't find her anywhere. Greg woke me and said, "Bella is lost. Help me find her." I've looked everywhere. So, I panic, I get the flashlight, I go outside in my nightclothes and freeze to death. I am screaming her name, I am opening closets, the dryer, the ceiling fan boxes in the recycling bin, LOOKING EVERYWHERE>>>and then I get Sophie and say, "lead me to your sister. Take me to Bella" because we can still hear her cry but can't find her. Well, Sophie goes under the bed, and as I crawl over there, Bella pops out of the closet. LITERALLY 3 FEET FROM MY DUMB HUSBANDS HEAD. The only place I didn't look in the last hour because it was the "first" place he looked. OMG. Instead of losing my temper, I simply looked at him and said, "Let's hope you had no aspirations for a job with CSI forensics. Nice job Columbo" and went to sleep.

However, I have yet to see Bella today. Can't find her anywhere. She is tramatized. Any advice? Uggghhh.

What I'm Watching on TV this week...

Ok, I'm sick of watching George Lopez reruns. I love that show and now really regret having not watched it because it was hysterical. Thankfully TIVO to the rescue for reruns. I only started watching after catching his HBO special.

So, I did a little run through the GUIDE today and a little research online, and oh, wait a minute...side track. Brad Paisley just put out a new video to his song "Im So Much Cooler Online" and it's brilliant. Jason Alexander stars as a geek that creates a MySpace page and surfs for chicks while wearing his Spock Trekky ears. His dad is William Shatner and the mom is George's mom from Seinfeld. And Puddy is in there too. Also, Kellie Pickler makes a cameo (and screws it up, forget to sing AND dance and only dances, while the girl on the other side of Jason/Brad, is Taylor Swift and she sings...what a dummy cat Kellie is). Anyway, the video is hysterical and the song is awesome, so go find it online. You can catch it on CMT Top 20 countdown show as well.

Ok, back to tv. That lady comedienne on E! debuts this week. Chelsea Lately is the name. Record it. And then there is supposed to be a brilliant new show called Mad Men on AMC that is written by a guy from The Sopranos, and is about an ad agency office environment. One hour on AMC. Weird channel for a one hour series.

Ok, I'm watching some wacked show on Fine Living right now, and they have a chick that converted a school bus to a mobile gym and will roll up to your crib and make you sweat and drive away. I bet the price makes me sweat before I leave my doorstep. And actually, if you are too lazy to go to a gym, LA"ZINESS may be your issue, not working out.

Oh God, my husband is yelling at me to hurry up. We are going to Sebastopol so he can drop off his axles for the race car. I, on the other hand, am not hanging out with the car dudes, but am dropping his ass and going antique shopping. Let's just say, I'm going along for the ride and the shopping location. And he is going to buy me a sandwich at some mecca of deli's he discovered over there. It's about 35 minutes across the Napa Valley to get there, so should be fun.

Hope your Sunday is a good one. More tonite.

CB

Internal Body Clocks

How important do you think they are? Do you believe in the "don't drink caffeine after 4:00pm" rule? Do you go to bed in the same ritual every night, so let your body know you are shutting down? Is your boudoir zoned for sex only, and not paying bills, clipping toenails, grooming the dog or watching tv (unless it's porn, which then classifys it back to earlier in sentence.). And finally, why is Cole asking us about this???

Because, I got ripped out of my bed at 5:45 am this morning so my husband and neighbor could crawl in the attic at 7:00 am and I would not be allowed back in my bedroom after that time. And it has wrecked my Saturday. I am a zombie. I can barely function. I went to have a pedicure and the lady literally nearly put me to sleep in the chair. My husband says I am being fussy like a toddler. And I dragged my pillow to the couch to "take a nap" and he laughed at me. (We don't nap at my house...well, atleast I don't, I'm too high strung. He falls asleep after work before I get home.) But no shit, my clock is off and I swear I am sleepwalking.

I want to go see Hairspray. I remember the early one directed by John Waters with that drag queen as Tracy Turnblad's mother, what was her/his name??? And John Travolta looks awesome on the billboards. He's so wacko. Ricki Lake has virtually disappeared so I forgot she starred in Broadway production and that's where she was discovered, right?

Jeffro, shut it about my squishy seat, you goof. Why do you think it's so funny? Do you have a bike? I bet you wish you had a gel seat if you did. I'm just kidding you. Sorry Chad if I offended you making fun of Clay Aiken.

I heard on the American Idol tour that Jordin is not in love with Blake as rumored, but instead has eyes for Chris Richardson. I hope she doesn't work her way through the lineup and I am subjected to pics of her towering over Sanjaya! Ugh.

Speaking of the hairwhipped wonder, I heard that Chris Sligh is forced to play guitar for him while he tackles "Life Is A Highway" by Rascal Flatts...and it stinks. And Chris almost rolls his eyes.

More later, going out to dinner.

ColeyB Yaaawwwwnnnnniiinnnnnngggggg............

Clay Aiken...hmmmm...what's he sayin?

I'm thinking Clay is saying...

"Hey beer guy...I'll take a 20 oz, a hot dog, and $20.00 to the person that can score me a bag of Chee-toes. The flamin' hot ones"

Clay is a little bigger than the skinny geek I remember. And he got shoved by some rantin' Okie (slang for person from Oklahoma, for those slow on the uptake) on the plane the other day cuz he shoved his foot onto her arm rest. Now I ask you, when have you ever fallen so asleep on a plane that you lifted your foot up on an armrest and had no idea you were spread eagle in the friendly skies, with all your junk spread out for the passengers to gawk at. Come ON! I think his ass was just sprawled out makin' a spectacle of himself because he was hopped up on carbs. He has definitely not missed out on any of Nabisco or Frito-Lays summertime treats. Who has a full punch card from Cold Stone Creamery? Clay-boy does. Ok, I'm mean for the chubby jokes, but really, he irritates me with his big old gawky self thinking he is someone special.

The real caption to this photo on Superficial was really mean and nasty. I do have morals. Of an alley cat, but still, I'm just sayin'.

CW is recovering from food poisoning. Everyone send good thoughts her way, and by the way, it was beef not chicken that took her down. Wow. Trippy.

I spent today in a most humbling experience. Sat at the bedside of Amy while she got her last and final chemo treatment for her unfortunate case of Cancer. Amy is such a trouper. As I told Famous Julian on the celly tonite, they would have had to start my drips with valium before any of the chemicals, 'cuz that shit made me nervous and I was just watching. At one point I was on the phone talking and I suddenly got fixated by the red junk going in her veins and I thought I might cry. Like I said, if you need to have your "what's important in life" button reset, hang out in oncology at Stanford Medical Center. Big hugs to Amy...she is my hero! She starts radiation in 4 weeks and hopefully she will continue her amazing recovery and remission.

So, many of you liked the Sting pics. I really must find that movie for sure. What the hell happened to Top chef? Is my TIVO screwing up and not recording it?

Ok, I've hit a wall. I had to get up at 5:00 am to get Amy to the Cancer WingDing and I feel like I was the one with the chemo drip, I'm so beat. And Famous Julian and I have a lot of work to do in the am. We just finished our first set of packaging together and it's stellar!!!

Night nite everyone.

Deep Thoughts from Famous Julian...on Sting

Famous Julian sent in his 2 cents and a pic. He writes:

"I think Sting is hilarious.
He's pretty good and all, but boy does he take himself seriously.
Did you ever see "Bring on the Night"?
It's a self-glorifying documentary he made about himself in the
eighties. Wow it's funny. I'm giggling now just thinking about it.
Oh yes, and he just released that very serious album of Lute music.
Lute music!
He recites bad poetry accompanied by equally bad Lute music.
God I love it.
Maybe I'm just jealous."

Ok, I'm giggling, thinking of FJ giggling. And I am counting the minutes until Christina comments on "Bring on the Night" because most assuredly she knows the director or the craft services person, or has an affair with Sting, and my money is on the latter. Snicker, snicker. Luv ya' CW. :)

Cole