Calling for Barack

What do me and Sarah Jessica Parker have in common? We are both volunteers for Barack. I volunteered to make phone calls to swing states this weekend. I am so excited. I'm going down there on Sunday...to campaign hdqtrs in my badass town.

Whoo Hoo.

Hey, I met a stranger in Starbucks on Thursday night. Our first official STITCH AND BITCH. It's odd, but I am really into this knitting shit. And sadly, I found that I suck at knitting. In case you can't tell, I pride myself on being good at stuff. If I'm not good, I don't do it. I don't really take risks unless I know I can excel. This is why I don't exercise. It's just not in the cards for me. So, this woman shows up and we share our junk...and then she watches me knit and says...well, that is hard for you because you are throwing your yarn wrong. CRUSHED. I have knitted so many things, and turns out I was doing it wrong. For the love of God, I am so lame. But, I just sucked it up. And she taught me a new cast on (secretly, I know she was thinking, this chicks a dumbo) and I picked it up really quickly. But anyway...she agreed to meet again next week. So, that's fun.

Oh, before I forget, in case I croak, I want someone to tell my funeral home that this is what I want on my tombstone..."Curiosity Did NOT Kill this Cat". OMG, I love that. Some famous person just passed away and said this in an interview before his death. What a great quote.

I only got 10 tricksters tonite. I am stuck with 15.00 of crap. I've eaten 1 pack of Skittles, a tootsie roll, 1 tiny Twizzler, and a Milky Way Mint.

Where's my insulin drip?

Carrie Underwood Has a New Bachelor on the Hook...

He's Travis Dork...umm I mean Stork from The Bachelor and he was the ER doctor dude. I can't even remember who he pretended to love and then lost later when the cameras stop rolling and they were trying to 'keep it real'.

Carrie is such a beauty queen. OMG, she could not be more pretty. Who knows, she may be a future VP Candidate.

It's still Halloween!

Countdown to Count Dracula.

xoxo,

ColeyB

Sinfully Sexy David Cook!

Mmmm...Cookie.   Enjoy basking in the glow of his man-ness.

Hey you little ghosts and goblins out there! Yummy yummy candy coming you way. Oh what a beautiful day...a day when we celebrate scaring the shit out of people and eating our weight in SUGAR, hopefully washed down with high fructose corn syrup, It's the one day of the year to celebrate our sugar addiction. HA. Be sure to have a pot of coffee handy for that inevitable sugar crash, when you need a pick me up, as the doorbell keeps ringing after 9:00 pm.

I loves me some Halloweenie. Currently, I have one bag of Skittles Jrs, to give out. I plan to go out at 3:00 to buy whatever is left out there. Remember, we cannot have candy in this house before the last minute. (see above) Also, I know that I will go next door later tonite, and "trick or treat" my senior citizen neighbors next door, because they always buy GOOD candy and too much. Yes, I refuse to give up the t&t.

So have some fun out there. Don't eat anything not wrapped, and of course, if you drop a piece, remember the 5 second rule!!!

xoxo-

ColeyB

Perez's Quote of the Day

“She is a governor, the most popular governor in America. I think she is the most qualified of any that has run recently for vice president.”

- John McCain tells Don Imus, on those who criticize Sarah Palin's qualifications to be President of the Unites States

Ok, so for those of you stuck in a time warp, or disconnected from Politics due to the (fill in the blank), let's dissect this quote, and see if 51% of it would sway you to voting for him.

1. She is a governor - YES. This is true. He gets a percentage for that.
2. The most popular governor in America. - Unsubstantiated, unprovable. Hype. - DING, he loses points for this. Now, let's try to help him out by saying...how many people turn up for a Palin rally? The most recent rallys look to be in small venues (parking lots of malls and stuff) and there might be 5,000 people. Barack Obama had something like 30,000 show up at a rally this weekend. I also saw on CNN, where they were broadcasting live...all four rallys (biden, obama, palin, mccain) in 4 states...and one reporter said, and I KID YOU NOT, that a McCain campaign worker asked her to come inside and help 'fill the room' because they didn't have a very large crowd. The reporter declined, stating she was a member of the media. The man smiled and walked away (probably to change panties because you know he ______ himself) knowing that was going to make on National news, which it did, right to my bedroom in Vallejo, California! HA! Ok I digress..let's get back to the dissection.3. I think she is the most qualified of any (governor) that has run recently for vice president. Mmm...let me think about that...what Governor ran as a vice-presidential running mate? Dont' say Bush or Clinton because they both ran as governors for PRES, not VP. Gore, Edwards (senator) Bush Cheney (old cabinet member), Kerry/??? who was that? In any case, I think I have made my point. It was a weird point because RECENTLY there have been no governors running for VP.
4. He was talking to Don Imus, who was fired for being a racist fool. What campaign worker booked that deal. That's like Obama going on Limbaugh. Come ON? Well I think that's even worse. 
Ok, so I guess I am just so surprised at how fearful I am about Republicans still running the country. I'm worried about the cabinet he'd pick...how many markers over the last 35 years in Senate are going to get called in by his cronies, etc.

Lord please let Obama win. Lord, don't pick up that phone when Palin calls, she's just drunk dialing you I'm sure.
Coley

OMG David Cook is going to be on SNL..Nov 1

OMG OMG...I'm so excited.

I can't believe he is already going to be on, when his album doesn't drop until Nov. 18. That's spectacular. Fantastical. Ben Affleck is the celeb host. Wonder if David will do a skit...like as an American Idol contestant and maybe they will have a fake panel, with Kennan as Randy, Patricia as Pauler, and Ben Affleck as Simon. Could be hysterical.

SNL is so great this season. I'm just sad Amy Poehler is leaving. So sad. Her husband Will Arnett is on the season premiere of 30 Rock which by the way you can watch now on hulu.com.

bye now....gotta get back to drooling over, I mean watching Jon Hamm host SNL. It's 12:10 pm and my hubby is working o/t tonite, and won't be home until 1:30am. I told him I'd stay up and wait for him. He's sad he had to work. I made a special French Toast overnight in the frig deal that he loves...as a surprise in the am. And I got him fancy sausages too. He will be happy.

xoxo...



PS, yes I know about Jennifer Hudson's sad news. I can't even comment. It's too sad and what would I say? It's too sad. Prayers go out to her and her family. She has a deep faith and trust in God. She will get through it.

Scary Men at my Door!!! Halloween's Coming....Muhahahahahahaha!!!!

I call these my Halloween Hooligans. And believe it or not, when I leave for work every morning, I catch a glimpse of the Goony-Eyed Pumpkin Head Man, and he scares the Beejeezus out of me. I drop my eyes every time. My aunt was visiting and she jumped one morning too!

I got all the clothes at Goodwill...that's an old straw hat from gardening, my neighbors old shoes, and the eyeballs and mask were toys. I love him when he comes to life each year. This is his 3rd year to visit the Bronns. He's our buddy now. Come trick or treat night, those little kids just FREAK out by him. They ask if they can touch him, and when they timidly reach out to touch his arm, I suddenly shout "OUCH" and they scream. LOL

I usually answer the door in a wig. This year, either I'm going to be the Cat In the Hat again or I'm putting on the Peg Bundy wig. One year I answered the door in my wedding veil.

Me loves me some Halloweenie! I don't buy candy until noon on Oct. 31 though. OMG, I ate my weight in crap one year and said NEVER again. I admit, I am powerless over the draw of a tiny candy bar, all shiny, just sitting in the bright orange pumpkin. Just waiting to travel to some kids home, to be devoured later that night, under the bedsheets with a flashlight, long after they were supposed to go to sleep. I didn't do that though, I was way too neat as a child. My sister and I were NOT allowed to eat any candy while still collecting. We went home and poured it all out on a tablecloth spread on the floor, and then we began the BARTERING and TRADING, something on the order of The New York Stock Exchange. I hated dark chocolate and she knew it. She used it as a negotiation tactic. She wouldn't do a 1-for-1 exchange when she knew I was getting something clearly better than I was giving away, namely anything with coconut or milk chocolate. I'm surprised we didn't whip out the rulers and scales. Many a bag of Skittles were ripped into, with the contents divided equally, after we quit arguing over who got stuck with the green ones and who got the pink ones. We were greedy little bitches. But it was only once a year, and probably one of my favorite memories of childhood. Love you Seester!

xoxo,

ColeyB

Have you Voted Yet?

I have. At my kitchen table in my slippers and my favorite pjs. Felt so American.

I know that it's quiet apparent that I am a 'bleeding liberal' and I don't judge you if you're not. Republicans are funny too...look at the joke they voted to live in the White House for 8 years! LOL

Ok, so that was unkind.

Anyhoo...for those of you not living in California, this won't mean much. But voting NO on 8 is a very, very important measure to me. It's the simplest of things...don't bring government into the bedroom...don't judge those that love each other. Not allowing Gays to Marry is not going to turn them straight, nor keep a child of a gay couple from enjoying recess on the playground with your child. It's time to once again, stand up and let the old way of thinking go into the history books, along with Prohibition, Slavery and Woman not being allowed to vote. Can you imagine...I had to beg my husband to REGISTER to vote...and way back in time, I wouldn't even have been able to myself. Time changed that...and it's time it changed our view on gay marriage.

Thanks for listening...or reading. I have to get on my box every once in a while. To balance out my news about stupid celebrities.

Peace-Out

I've Been Cheating on You...

I have been spending my time indulging my own fantasies on other web sites, and ignoring my blog. I admit it and I feel guilty. Can I beg your forgiveness?

I have become hooked on a knitting website, no pun intended...well, maybe a little bit intentional.

And guess what? I joined a blog thread on there for Bay Area Knitters. And one day I was just browsing through the thread topics and saw how everyone was so excited about Alice 97.3 radio station, they fired the DJ "No Name" and got the old DJ "Vinnie" back. So the Sarah and Vinnie Morning Show is ON again. Whoo Hoo. They are so fucking funny. I remember them talking all about the first American Idol, and arguing about whether winning would crush your career or not...Now remember, at this point there was no such thing as Kelly Clarkson. So anyway, as time went on Kelly was the best, but they fought about Justin. Anyhoo, it was tons of fun.

So, I wrote Sarah & Vinnie a fan letter. I told him the "Bay Area Knitters" love that Vinnie is back (he went to rehab for like 7 years. ha ha) AND GUESS WHAT? They read my letter on the air and laughed about it and stuff. HA HA HA. What a fucking hoot. I am trying to get it downloaded now.

How random is that?

xoxo,

ColeyB

It's Naked Cowboy Thursday!!!

Today I am on vacation.

What better way to start a 4 day weekend that finding an email with naked cowboys? We can all use a little more cowboy in our lives. They run wild in Texas. Really, you should go sometime. They call them Naked Rodeos...it's a special underground society, but they give out directions and discount coupons at most Dairy Queens and Quickie Marts, along with driver's licenses according to my grouchy horn-honking stepdad.

Now, being in the creative business that I'm in, I've been on dozens of photo shoots...mostly shooting food and sunglasses, in former jobs. But I can only imagine what this photo session must have been like.

Photographer: "Uh, Bob, can you lift your left leg up a bit, it looks like you are about to pee. And Steve, could you please stand a little taller, you're, umm, rather well-endowed, and I'm sure you're proud, but your junk if falling below the wood. No pun intended."

OMG, I made a funny. I cannot even finish this post. My imagination has rendered me unable to type.

Happy Thursday...and Happy Weekend.

xoxo,

Cowgirl Coley

Project Runway - My prediction

I have just finished watching the 3 runway finalist present at Bryant Park. And I am in Camp Leanne. Let's see what happens.

Korato was good too. Kenley had weird shit.

JLo hurt her foot....my ass. She ran a marathon a couple weeks later. Bi-yatch

Presidential Candidates: Cheat Sheet for Dummies

For those of you who got this in email today, I hope you laughed as hard as me.

xoxo,

ColeyB

Very tired...must post for fear you think I abandoned you

I'm tired. This will be short. Nothing good to talk about really...

Except I went to pick up Chinese food tonite, and they were about to close, and bamboozled me into buying all the food on the steam tray for 1/2 price. My original total was $25.00...and then I spent $40. And I hate leftovers, so Greg gets them. I'm a sucker for a bargain.

I never left the house this weekend except to get my hair cut and colored. LAZY. More like...no $$$. My car has a fucking cracked windshield again. yes, REALLY. Like my car is made of rock magnets, I swear to God.

My husband and I cleaned out our office today. OMG, what trainwreck. That's why I am tired.

Do you know how many Dr. Phil books I unearthed? I must have been an emotional fuck up a while back...they were shoved way in the back. I'm donating a bunch of books to the library. Let someone else read Dr. Phil's shit.

I made pancakes this morning. You know, I buy the heart healthy BIsquick mix, and then use butter to grease the pan. I am a mess. I also made home made lemonade from the lemons in the back yard. Greg says I am like living in the Depression era. I even thought about selling my Nintendo Wii.

Guess what? My hubby never has registered to vote. He hated Bush and refused to vote. SO, I finally got the paperwork together and filled it out and as I was licking the stamp, I said.."You are voting for Barack, right?" And he said, "I'm undecided" (a buzzword from Jon Stewart show, he's learned) And I said, WHAT? I'm not going to all this trouble to register you, then fill out the paperwork to make you a permanent mail-in voter...and then you vote and basically x-out my vote?" I was so mad...then I saw he was kidding. I told him...well, I don't trust you. When your ballot shows UP, I'm filling it out and mailing it in. He said he'd have me jailed. LOL

Happy Columbus Day to everyone that gets the day off. I don't.

xoxo,

ColeyB

Project Runway - and then there were 3

SPoiler Alert....do not read further if you don't know Bryant Park Final 3.

Wow, I did not see that coming...but Jerrell did not bring the love to the finale. That was about the biggest, "let's throw everything at a manequin and see what sticks" dress I ever saw. That thing had to weigh 25 lbs.

Kenley picked the right time to peak. And Leann won that competition, do doubt.

Kyaoto CoCo has a great color pallet but her stuff is so intricate and sort of all starts to look the same in detailing. She is so talented but for couture...not mass appeal.

Should be an interesting Bryant Park. I'll miss Jerrell, but with Kenley still in, we still have a villain to BOO!!!

xoxo

ColeyB

Are you registered to vote?

Remember, if you are voting for Barack Obama, you should get get registered and get your absentee ballots to vote. If you are leaning towards McCain, your ballots are should be mailed no earlier than Nov. 5. Be sure to drop them at the post office on the 5th, so not to get tangled up with all the Obama votes cast on the 4th.

As Dave Barry wrote in his column...I hope you stay informed about the issues in this campaign. Because, as Benjamin Franklin once said: ''An informed voter is a voter whose vote doesn't count any more than the vote of a complete idiot.''

He was a wise man, Ben Franklin. He never got elected president, either.

ColeyB

Listen to this voicemail

http://view.break.com/527579
Ok, this voicemail is entitled "King of Douchebags". I got it from a friend, and you have to listen to 2 messages this guy left for a girl he met in a bar, named Olga. He is Dmitri. Give it a listen. Jeffro, I imagine this used to be your 'mo' when you were single. Kidding!!!!

ColeyB

It's Friday...whoo hoo!

So, you know what is exciting to me right now?  It's about to rain for the first time since May 16th.  For those of you who get rain regularly, I'm sure you don't find the significance to this as I see it.  But I LOVE the rain.  LOVE it.  Except driving in it.  The sky is grey and it's gloomy and it's SO COZY.  I love it.

Well, the debate was fun.  She's intriguing.  I'm worried that will translate to votes.  People hate government so bad right now, they are ready to vote for anyone that can change things.  And really, so what if she has no experience.  The dumbasses that are running the gov't with the supposed experience have sucked.  How could she do worse?  Get us into war...already there.  Let Wall St. bankrupt us.  Done.  So how bad could she make it?  Don't get me wrong, I'm not voting for her, but really, the experience thing is not cutting it for me.

So, I have cut 2 shows now off the new season of TV.  "Privileged" and "Worst Week".  Grey's Anatomy was pretty good at opening.  I don't think it was on last night, right?  Desperate Housewives is probably getting killed this week.  I hate Edie (Nicolette S.) and really I'm bored with the story lines already.  Delete.

So, what else am I doing...Nothing much.  I have kept my promise to not spend money on anything but food and gas.  I have been only tempted once, I broke my knitting needle for a scarf I am making.  I will wait one more week, until pay day, to buy a new pair.  Tough love.

Well, Project Runway has decided to draw out the drama and send all 4 into the running for Bryant Park.  Ho Hum.  They did that before.   I still think Jerrell will win.

Survivor is still pretty good, I still like it.  Amazing Race continues to interest me.  I liked Dirty Sexy Money this week...omg it is so good.  You need to go to abc.com and read the back story though.  Sorry if yoiu missed season 1 because it's much better with it.  And Samaire Armstrong is not on this season, it looks like.  she had personal problems at the end of the writer's strike shortened season, and ended up in rehab.  She may not be in the cast as Jeremy's twin any longer.  too bad.

Well, gotta go get on rain tracking.  I can't wait.

xoxo,

ColeyB