Hey party peeps! I'm back with this week's recap of the past 2 weeks. (hence the length...2 weeks for the price of one!)
Why did I skip a week of recapping? Besides The Sims(tm) sucking the life out of me more than usual this week, Idol Worshippers, I must admit having to recover from the shell-shocking cruelty the judges dished on the contestants in week 1. I mean, we have cruelty to animal laws on the books in all 50 states for a reason. I know there is a saying in news "If it bleeds, it leads", and so it goes in Hollyweird...the wackier the better. I admit, I don't pass car wrecks without rubbernecking...and I guess some of those people were just Reality TV Roadkill. New respect for Jewel: She wasn't having any part of the nastiness. Did you see how she wouldn't hug or acknowledge Simon at the end of the day? Total diss. Joan Collins aka. Carol Bayer Sager: Tried to be nasty and then just got bored it seemed. Just how much plastic surgery could that woman have undergone? Did you see her "younger days" retrospective. That woman has used her millions to virtually reverse the aging process like no one I've ever seen. As Joan Rivers would say, she's currently breathing through her belly button. Oprah: Kissed Simon's ass on her show last week. He sent her about 500 roses to fill her studio. No mention why? Mmm. It's weird. More later. I smell a deal in the works with Harpo and Simon.
Now back to Idol. So I was reading this seasons first update below, and I was pretty clear on why I watch the show and love it. Week 2 brought me back to it. I found myself just really enjoying some real people that just want to take a shot at a dream. I love the brother and sister....now that's just pure innocence and fun. And the little BFFs (best friends forever) from NYC just made me laugh. You know there will be some drama to come when one of them goes and one stays. Can't wait. BFF drama rules in reality tv.
My favorite moment this season so far was the girl who ran away from OHIO to NYC to try out...and Ryan called her Dad by cellphone so they could soften the blow. I cried for that little girl. Because my Dad has supported every move I've ever made, I couldn't imagine someone being seen as a disappointment by their dad. And that, my friends is the kind of reality slice of life that makes me want to watch next week. I naively want to believe it wasn't staged and is REAL. Those are the 4 most important letters in REALity tv.
What's not real. That jackass Ian Bernardo. I hate to even give him a mention in this, but I do, only to point out where I think Idol fails. We are too savvy of viewers now...we know they go through 2 rounds of auditions before Randy and Paula and SC see anyone. So it's pretty obvious he got through for his weirdness. So now we have weirdo auditions on top of talented ones. They might as well call it the Weird and the Wonderful weeks. Don't pass them off as real auditions and insult us with "Randy, Yes or No?" comments from Cowell. Would I do away with the weirdos? Heck no. Miss out on the opportunity of seeing that crazy "boobs at my waist" chick with the look-alike Joey Ramone mom? Or the girl with the pink sheer sleeves that looked like she had a sunburn to Simon (and my husband). Anyone need a "Cowardly Lion" impersonator? Or how about the Soap Opera actress who decided to try for a 3rd time for Hollywood. My favorite song ever to be butchered..."Don't Wish Your [insert gender here]friend was hot like me?" was awesome.
Spoiler alert. Did you see the outtake with Olivia Newton-John as a guest judge? I bet Cowell hits on her. He's sort of pervy this season.
Big news and confession time. First the confession. I did not watch Season 1 of American Idol. Believe it or not. I found out about Kelly Clarkson the old fashion way. When her single "Breakway" released, I bought the cd. I am a true fan because of her music. Now for the big news: The CW Network (ch. 44) is re-running the entire Season 1 beginning tonite. Idol Rerun I think it's called. Starts at 10:00 PST tonite and airs several episodes all during the week. Cannot wait to see how she won the title. Bad news is I have to endure that Justin Guarini dweeb. But I will be happy knowing he loses during every episode I watch.
Other Idol news: Chris Daughtry had the #1 album on Billboard last week. 1.29 million sold. Yeah! I love him. Katharine McPhee drops her new cd on New Music Tuesday, Jan 30. Elliott Yamin and his Amazing $50,000 Chompers (not the name of his band, by the way) debuts his new cd March 20.
And finally, I saved the biggest news for last. Don't you just love it when 2 of your favorite things collide?
Well, imagine my excitement when I saw Kelly Clarkson and NASCAR have hooked up! She is the sound of Nascar beginning at SpeedWeek for the Daytona 500. It's like so exciting I can't stand it. I wish she would debut a new single that week...she is supposed to have a new cd out in February, which is when the Daytona 500 is, for you Nascar-illiterate.
Thanks for hanging with me on this long one. I get a little more wordy when writing from home. Would love to hear from you too. Please feel free to pass on your wisdom and wittiness, so we can all share in our love of Idol. I mean, if you don't love Idol, why are you reading this? Torture? Until next recap...
*Idol Up*
Sunday, January 28, 2007
Tuesday, January 16, 2007
Season 6 Begins
Idol is BACK and I couldn’t be happier. It’s like the Daytona 500 for me…only it happens every week! Endless fun! Sometimes, I admit, people ask me…what the hell Cole? Why do you like that show so much? I can’t explain it, so I give them a blank stare and ask them politely, “What show do you watch on PLANET LAME?” And then we part ways.
Seriously, it’s just more fun now that I have seen winners soar to superstardom. I just love the whole crazy process and seeing how a good agent, good song writing and good management can result in a great career or a fumbled one-hit-wonder. And I consider myself the focus group of one. If I like them, they make it. If not, forget about it. However, I will say that I have been very disappointed at Bo Bice’s disappearance. Bad management or something. And I don’t think Taylor is going to make a Soul Patrol run up the charts. His :15 min. of fame can’t stretch into the new season. I hope I am wrong.
It’s a little early to have any good snarky comments on Idol contestants, so let’s take a little walk down memory lane…a little “Where are they now?” for our little idols from seasons past.
Chris Daughtrey – Should have been the winner last year. Thanks his lucky stars and his new bank account balance every night that he didn’t win. Smart as hell for not fronting the existing band…knew he could stand on his own, and is doing quite well. CD is awesome. Even harshest critics agree. He’s well on his way…already sold 1 million records. I was so excited to watch him rock in the new year in Times Square with Daughtrey. He bought his family a fat house with a pool, tossed them the keys and went back on tour. He’s a great interview…Ellen Degeneres would probably flip teams for him…she absolutely drooled over him on the show. I love him too. Can’t wait to see who my new crush will be this season. I’m giddy as a schoolgirl.
Kat McPhee – Anyone see her in the Rose Parade? She’ll be an actress. I don’t look to hear much from her. Lots of magazine covers, and plenty of run-ins with paparazzi. She such a Katie Holmes look-alike some times.
Elliott – got $50,000 veneers donated to him from some LA doctor. His grill looks great. May hear from him soon. Wait and see.
Ace Young – by now you know he picked me from the crowd on Rodeo Dr. during my sabbatical to have my picture taken with him. What a thrill. Amy tells me he was spotted in SF over New Year’s. His single only sold 3,000 downloads so far. He better polish those pearly whites and get to TV Land. I heard a comedy was in the making.
Ok, let’s get it over with…JENNIFER HUDSON…OH MY GOD….A Golden Globe award winner….Holy “how’d that happen” Batman? I saw Simon Cowell go on Oprah when she had the Dreamgirls cast on…and kiss her booty. He admitted he was so wrong and wished her the best of everything. It was quite nice. Beyonce’ must be a bitch, because no winner of Dreamgirls thanked her in their speeches last night.
Kellie Pickler – riding the blond Country Girl wagon in her red high heels all the way to the bank. I was actually in downtown Nashville at a bbq joint over Christmas when her song came on and people were whoopin’ it up. Hollywood is fascinated by her too. Again, Ellen Degeneres had her singing and dancing and laughing.
Clay Aiken – Lord, that man needs therapy. He’s ballooned up 30 lbs and talks about his “obsessive compulsive” tendencies with everything in his kitchen being blue or silver. Did you see the riff he had with Kelli Ripa. Hee hee. I loved it. Until Rosie O’Donnell had to step in and make a big ‘gay’ deal out of it all…hey Rosie, nice job outing someone who isn’t OUT! Clumsy Lezbot. (Yes, I said it.) Nothing against Lezbots, but really, it’s not your business to out someone.
Kelly Clarkson – I might predict a crossover hit to the country genre some day for Kelly. Her new album comes out in Feb…so we might have to wait until the next one…but she has been cozying up to Reba McIntyre and Carrie Underwood. If she has smart business peeps, they know that country music sales were up in ’06, where they were down in the other genres of music. But I hope she doesn’t go Country 100%. We need her to keep the Britney and Jessica’s drowned out.
Taylor – Mmmm? Dunno and hope for something good, feeling it’s wishful thinking.
Ruben – Who?
Bo Bice – Come on? What’s up?
Let’s see…who else??? Mmmmm…..well, of course I saved the very best for last.
CARRIE UNDERWOOD….My favorite. My husband refers to her as “my girl”. She has sold over 4.5 million copies of her cd. She’s superfragilistically awesome. I love her, except now she is dating Tony Romo, QB of the Dallas Cowboys, and I hate that. Please don’t become a celebrity-dating dummy girl, Carrie.
So, I’m signing off. If you don’t want to get the AI blogs this season…I’ll be happy to remove you from the list. And of course, we will be having the IDOL POOL as we get closer to the end. More on that later… :15 minutes to showtime on the East Coast.
* Idol Up *
Seriously, it’s just more fun now that I have seen winners soar to superstardom. I just love the whole crazy process and seeing how a good agent, good song writing and good management can result in a great career or a fumbled one-hit-wonder. And I consider myself the focus group of one. If I like them, they make it. If not, forget about it. However, I will say that I have been very disappointed at Bo Bice’s disappearance. Bad management or something. And I don’t think Taylor is going to make a Soul Patrol run up the charts. His :15 min. of fame can’t stretch into the new season. I hope I am wrong.
It’s a little early to have any good snarky comments on Idol contestants, so let’s take a little walk down memory lane…a little “Where are they now?” for our little idols from seasons past.
Chris Daughtrey – Should have been the winner last year. Thanks his lucky stars and his new bank account balance every night that he didn’t win. Smart as hell for not fronting the existing band…knew he could stand on his own, and is doing quite well. CD is awesome. Even harshest critics agree. He’s well on his way…already sold 1 million records. I was so excited to watch him rock in the new year in Times Square with Daughtrey. He bought his family a fat house with a pool, tossed them the keys and went back on tour. He’s a great interview…Ellen Degeneres would probably flip teams for him…she absolutely drooled over him on the show. I love him too. Can’t wait to see who my new crush will be this season. I’m giddy as a schoolgirl.
Kat McPhee – Anyone see her in the Rose Parade? She’ll be an actress. I don’t look to hear much from her. Lots of magazine covers, and plenty of run-ins with paparazzi. She such a Katie Holmes look-alike some times.
Elliott – got $50,000 veneers donated to him from some LA doctor. His grill looks great. May hear from him soon. Wait and see.
Ace Young – by now you know he picked me from the crowd on Rodeo Dr. during my sabbatical to have my picture taken with him. What a thrill. Amy tells me he was spotted in SF over New Year’s. His single only sold 3,000 downloads so far. He better polish those pearly whites and get to TV Land. I heard a comedy was in the making.
Ok, let’s get it over with…JENNIFER HUDSON…OH MY GOD….A Golden Globe award winner….Holy “how’d that happen” Batman? I saw Simon Cowell go on Oprah when she had the Dreamgirls cast on…and kiss her booty. He admitted he was so wrong and wished her the best of everything. It was quite nice. Beyonce’ must be a bitch, because no winner of Dreamgirls thanked her in their speeches last night.
Kellie Pickler – riding the blond Country Girl wagon in her red high heels all the way to the bank. I was actually in downtown Nashville at a bbq joint over Christmas when her song came on and people were whoopin’ it up. Hollywood is fascinated by her too. Again, Ellen Degeneres had her singing and dancing and laughing.
Clay Aiken – Lord, that man needs therapy. He’s ballooned up 30 lbs and talks about his “obsessive compulsive” tendencies with everything in his kitchen being blue or silver. Did you see the riff he had with Kelli Ripa. Hee hee. I loved it. Until Rosie O’Donnell had to step in and make a big ‘gay’ deal out of it all…hey Rosie, nice job outing someone who isn’t OUT! Clumsy Lezbot. (Yes, I said it.) Nothing against Lezbots, but really, it’s not your business to out someone.
Kelly Clarkson – I might predict a crossover hit to the country genre some day for Kelly. Her new album comes out in Feb…so we might have to wait until the next one…but she has been cozying up to Reba McIntyre and Carrie Underwood. If she has smart business peeps, they know that country music sales were up in ’06, where they were down in the other genres of music. But I hope she doesn’t go Country 100%. We need her to keep the Britney and Jessica’s drowned out.
Taylor – Mmmm? Dunno and hope for something good, feeling it’s wishful thinking.
Ruben – Who?
Bo Bice – Come on? What’s up?
Let’s see…who else??? Mmmmm…..well, of course I saved the very best for last.
CARRIE UNDERWOOD….My favorite. My husband refers to her as “my girl”. She has sold over 4.5 million copies of her cd. She’s superfragilistically awesome. I love her, except now she is dating Tony Romo, QB of the Dallas Cowboys, and I hate that. Please don’t become a celebrity-dating dummy girl, Carrie.
So, I’m signing off. If you don’t want to get the AI blogs this season…I’ll be happy to remove you from the list. And of course, we will be having the IDOL POOL as we get closer to the end. More on that later… :15 minutes to showtime on the East Coast.
* Idol Up *
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